Riders End
by katrina3198
Summary: What does Karigan's life look like after the heartache of Firebrand?
1. Chapter 1

Karigan loosed a long, heartfelt sigh.

She was tired, bone tired and could have fallen asleep right at her desk. She massaged some of the tight spots in her neck before removing her eye patch and rubbing her irritated eye. At least she had finished a goods day's work. Rider payroll was up to date, the new recruits had been allocated quarters and her monthly report was signed, sealed and ready for delivery to Colonel Mapstone. She enjoyed the sense of accomplishment, something which had been far too lacking of late. The wounds she had endured as a result of the recent P'ehdrose mission had by necessity meant she could work for only small periods of time before she required a break from her duties. She looked at the completed report again in satisfaction.

She muffled a moan of pain as she stood, preparing for the slow trudge back to her quarters. She had only been home for several weeks and was feeling less and less positive about her long term recovery. She had become frustrated by any lack of real improvement despite a surprisingly uneventful journey home. Karigan snorted to herself, musing. She didn't really need much of an excuse to be frustrated these days.

She considered her pain laden movements. This naturally led her thoughts back to the clearing where she had lain wounded and begun healing with the aid of a gentle Eletian and an old friend. And a king. She blushed unconsciously and as always her thoughts found themselves dissecting her journey home.

She remembered with such clarity the nervousness that had pitted her stomach as she rode up the Winding way. There were so many things that had clouded her mind during the journey home. How was she to continue her sword master training? How was she to tell her family? How would Mapstone handle the news given the upcoming battle? What would her place be in that battle? What would she say to Mara? These thoughts swirled and churned in her mind, begetting question after question. But underneath these stresses another whispered thought gnawed at the heart of her worry, a question slowly burning through her days and nights.

How would…no; how _could_ she face the king?

Initially she had refused to think of Zachary and focused on her other troubles, but in moments of vulnerability she always returned to him. His soft words, his worried eyes. Their moment of hidden love that tortured her mind as much as her wounds tortured her body. One night she had been in the middle of re-bandaging a wound on her lower back that had opened after the day's riding, when she remembered his gentle attempts to take her mind off the pain. She had gulped at the flood of anguish that was held at bay by fragile threads. Condor chose that moment to wicker and softly nudge her cheek with his soft nose.

That was all it took. Her defences shattered. Within moments Karigan was keening with grief and clung to Condor with all the strength she had. After her tears were spent, exhaustion followed. The morning found her feeling more herself than she had in a long time.

Her thoughts were drawn to the king more often than not over the next two days of travel. As she had ridden through the castle gates she had glanced up and her heart had caught in her throat. There on the parapet, crowned by a cerulean sky was her sovereign. Staring back. After a moment, she bowed from her saddle and saw his arm rise slightly in greeting. Before another moment could pass she nudged Condor towards rider stables, her heart pounding.

What followed was as sweet a reception as she could possibly have hoped for. The younger riders were cheery, the new riders eager to say hello. And her friends. There was such gentleness in their treatment of her but she was also relieved that they acted like not much had changed. She was also happy to know that only Mara has been informed of the nature of her injuries. Karigan, of course, assumed Trace knew too, since she would have undoubtedly reported to Colonel Mapstone once Connly has arrived at the camp where she had been recovering in Enver's tent. Karigan had managed to escape from the throng relatively quickly, which was a blessing as she was in agony and it was difficult to keep up her spirits in front of the other riders. She had also forgotten what it was like to be around so many people!

Mara had escorted her to her room. "It is such a relief to have you home, I cannot believe you were gone so long'. Karigan chuckled. "Well, the paths from the P'ehdrose homeland are not the best tracks I've ever seen. It took a while for me to work my way out". Mara had shaken her head. "I still can't believe they are real. And that you found them! But I meant that the road from the encampment was clear, so we expected you many days ago. We were getting worried."

Karigan was silent for some time, unpacking her things and wondering who the "we" included. "It was…difficult for me to travel quickly". Mara had looked sad. "Of course, I understand," she had replied quietly. "Now, Colonel Mapstone is currently in a meeting, so I think you should take the opportunity to clean up". Karigan must have brightened considerably at this prospect for Mara laughed heartily. She then gave her friend a quick, fierce hug around her neck before letting herself out. Karigan's back was screaming and she had groaned in delight upon entering the blissfully hot tub.

Her meeting afterwards with the Colonel had been tiring. She had entered the study apprehensively and had been greeted with a touching amount of warmth. The Colonel had looked her up and down with an appraising eye and Karigan had felt the sadness in that gaze. Laren had always been a patient listener and allowed Karigan time to stumble through the more personal parts of her official report. It appeared that Condor was, in fact, not the best audience for rehearsing with after all.

The interview finished in due course and Karigan was both impatient and apprehensive to hear Laren's assessment. "Well Karigan, we will need to spend some time working on your recovery. I would like you to see Ben this afternoon." Karigan started to protest, but stifled the complaint swiftly as the Colonel levelled a look at her. "Of course, Colonel". Laren had grinned. "I'll expect you would like to hear who has been promoted to Chief Rider?" Karigan grimaced. Putting two and two together on her ride home, she was suspicious about just who had received the dubious honour of scheduling and payroll. Laren chuckled. "Congratulations!"

'Thank you, Colonel". Laren sobered and continued on. "You will need some time for recuperation before you begin your duties but I am sure Mara can hand over some of the less tiring tasks to you in the meantime." Karigan nodded.

"Now, do you need rest? If not, the King was desirous to hear of your mission outcome, and his meeting is due to finish-" the noon bell rung – "now.". Karigan had stared beyond Laren's shoulder blushing, she was sure, from her feet to her nose. "Of course, if it is the King's request." Laren had looked at her hard and nodded. With that the two had walked towards the castle.

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	2. Chapter 2

As they had made their way through the various corridors had led to the throne room, like arteries to a heart, Karigan had become increasingly nervous. And tired. Her footsteps flagged slightly as she struggled to keep up with the pace of her Colonel. Eventually they had made it to the throne room and Karigan took a deep breath as they entered the place and the moment that had so filled her thoughts on her journey home.

The king and his advisors were standing by the throne for a final discussion, as was their custom after a meeting concluded and the other parties had left. Karigan's eyes were glued to his back as she traced the familiar outline of his body, watching hungrily as he raked his long, slender fingers through his amber hair in thought. Huh, his beard had grown back. She had made it most of the way down the carpet when suddenly the Weapons stood to attention in their alcoves and Donal and Fastion came to stand in front of the king. Karigan was startled as they bowed as one to her. She was rooted to the spot, unsure where to look and choosing her very interesting boots. So unusual was this behaviour that the attention of the party was called towards her and she had looked up to find the king's eyes staring hard into her own. It was electric. She could not begin to process the jumble of feelings that soared through her. After a moment that lasted a lifetime she had come to her senses and bowed slowly and stiffly to her sovereign and to her Weapon friends.

"Karigan G'ladheon has returned from her mission to seek the P'ehdrose alliance and will attend our Operations meeting," she heard Colonel Mapstone explain to the group. Karigan stared at the rug in front of the king's feet. "Perhaps we should move into the side office, where we can be more comfortably seated?" came the king's soft voice, sending a thrill to her core. "Of course, your majesty," came Tallman's reply and after the king walked into the office, she heard Laren say "a moment, advisors.' Karigan's eyes went wide as she stared back at Laren, who stared straight back at her and raised a single finger. One minute. Karigan had taken a deep breath and plunged inside.

And then they were alone together. In one swift moment the king was in front of her. Karigan could barely look at him; her body was on fire, her mind confused, one part aching to be taken into his arms whilst the other part screamed to find safety. He did not touch her. "Are you well?" he had murmured after a moment. "Yes, your majesty," she replied softly. "Are you well?" she asked suddenly, her eyes searching for his shoulder where the wound that had threatened his life had taken hold. Her eyes travelled upwards and she trembled to see the love that lay in the depths of his tender gaze. "I am," he replied. He had raised his fingers and touched her cheek, the sensation feather light. For one paralysing moment her flight response reached its' peak. And then without knowing why she had brushed her cheek ever so slightly into his caress. A moment later the sound of approaching feet drew them apart and when Laren and Tallman entered, they were seated in their respective chairs.

Laren had been startled to find them seated as if enthroned together. They looked…like they belonged to each other. Karigan, who did not realise her face betrayed the significant pain she was in, looked regal as she sat next to her king, who had the bearing of a sovereign as well as a protective partner. Laren felt a pang of regret for both of them before the moment had passed and the meeting began.

Laren had been glad of hearing the report first. Karigan's delivery was much stronger the second time around although she did focus predominantly on the meeting with their new allies as opposed to the prior battles. Laren became suspicious with the vague details Karigan presented surrounding the Eletian and suspected more was at play that could not be revealed in such a meeting. No matter, she would discuss it with Karigan later.

After half a bell, two things became clear. Firstly the king's regard for Karigan had only intensified during his abduction. His whole being gravitated towards her. Secondly, Karigan's wounds were not good as she could clearly sit no longer. She moved constantly, trying to find relief from the pain and Laren was about to suggest a recess when a knock sounded at the door and in strode Estora.

Laren had stiffened at this entry when the king was so unguarded and hid a relieved sigh as the Queen, after bowing to her husband, conveniently allowing him time to school his expression, headed straight to Karigan and hugged her around the neck once she had straightened from her pained obeisance. Karigan looked surprised and Laren was pleased to see that Estora had placed her hands gently around Karigan's neck, rather than placing pressure on her wounds.

"It is so good to see you Karigan," she has said, her eyes shining with unshed tears. "I cannot begin to thank you for returning my husband to me. It seems we were both destined to be saved by you!" she said with a grin, turning her gaze to Zachary who nodded in agreement. "It was nothing, your majesty," came Karigan's soft reply. "Nothing?!" cried Estora. "Did you not re-enter the keep of the Second Empire to mount a rescue, even though you were healing from a battle yourself?" Karigan's eyes became further downcast as she muttered something about the duty of the kings' servants. Interesting. Zachary had told Estora she was in battle and had hidden the torture from her. Yes, something had definitely happened between them during their time together. Laren had coughed discreetly. "Your Majesties, please excuse us. My rider is greatly in need of rest and I think perhaps, the mender." Karigan looked at her gratefully and Laren had been slightly alarmed. It was unusual for a Green Rider to voluntarily attend a healer. "Of course, Colonel, and with Our blessing," Estora had replied, turning to Karigan again. "We are so glad you have returned to us Karigan. Once you feel well you must stop by for tea to meet the babies!" By this point Karigan had been in so much pain that the full impact of Estora's words had not registered, which she was thankful for after.

Laren had said their goodbyes and they bowed themselves out, although Karigan was only able to bend slightly. The tears in Karigan's eyes had made it difficult for her to navigate towards the menders wing and she was thankful for Laren's guidance. Her back was screaming. She thought there had been some improvement on her journey home but she had not anticipated the impact that those tense meetings would have on her healing muscles. She was thankful for the Colonel's silence during their walk and shortly afterwards she was standing in front of Ben.

"Karigan, you're back!" She smiled at him. "Hi Ben." Laren spoke, "Ben, I need you to look over Karigan's wounds and let me know what duties to restrict her on". Laren had been about to step out when Karigan called to her. "Yes?" Laren replied. "I think, maybe, you should stay." Laren nodded and stood to the side. Ben had tended to the gash on Karigan's arm, which looked nasty but the Eletian's care had clearly accelerated her healing. Afterwards he had moved to her front and helped with her greatcoat and shirt.

Laren was saddened to see Karigan's belly and the scars that ranged over it but injury was always a risk in their line of duty and that was that. The bandages around her midsection were dirty from the road and Ben had cut them from her side. It was quicker than unwinding them and there was no way he would reuse that dirty linen in his healing rooms. Karigan was bare, eyes closed and Ben had moved around to tend her back, stopping to look at Laren with wide eyes before swallowing and returning to his patient. His hands traced patterns over her back, trailing a tinge of green. Laren took the opportunity to move behind Karigan and sighed.

Even with her experience, her knowledge of man's sinister ways and her exposure to battle, she had rarely seen such extensive damage. Remnants of vivid bruising marked Karigan's skin to form swirling patterns of yellow amongst the red of angry scarring. Her skin was mutilated; her musculature destroyed. Drent was going to have a hard time rehabilitating this mess of muscle. As Ben and Karigan discussed her wounds quietly, Laren came to realise that Karigan had clung to the hope that Ben might be able to restore her to her previous state of fitness. Laren's eyes had uncharacteristically teared and she cleared her throat. "Karigan, I am sorry for all you have been through on this mission. You will clearly need some time to recover before resuming light duties." Karigan has just nodded and Laren was moved to place her hand on Karigan's arm in support. "We are here for you," she had said softly. "You will not be alone as you regain your strength."

Ben had insisted she spend the night in the healing wing where he could review her wounds in more depth and develop a recovery plan. The next morning when Laren arrived to collect her Chief Rider he had confessed to using more of his true healing on Karigan. Laren had not the heart to rebuke him for using his gift on non-royal blood, even in this critical time after the Queen's recent birthing.


	3. Chapter 3

Karigan was drawn back from her musings to discover her feet had led her to the mess hall. It was lunch time on a surprisingly cold spring day; surprising as summer was so close and the last fortnight had been quite pleasant. The cooks had prepared a heartening meal and Karigan was glad to see Mara sitting near a window and joined her as soon as her tray was full.

Mara looked up and smiled. "Howdy!" Karigan smiled in spite of herself. She felt withdrawn from those around her, not only because of her experiences. She felt that the general mood of the castle had degenerated as Sacoridia's armies prepared themselves for the upcoming war. Mara's smiling disposition was a nice change from the gloominess that had pervaded her thoughts and surroundings. She was suddenly sick of feeling unhappy and felt determined to have a nice afternoon. "What are you up to?" "Ugghhhh, meetings'. Karigan laughed. "Are you busy this afternoon?" Mara paused and tilted her head thoughtfully. "Nope, just paperwork today, which I can catch up on later. What do you have in mind? Trip into town?" Karigan smiled. "No, I thought perhaps you might want to join me in the baths since it's on the colder side today?" Mara's eyes lit up. "Ooooooh, yes! Much better idea!" Karigan laughed and the two chatted happily whilst they finished eating their lunch, Karigan closing her eyes in delight as the warm, buttery pear tart infused her mouth with delicious flavours. Mara smiled at her friends' enjoyment as it had been a while since Karigan had looked so content.

The two headed to the castle's communal baths. They had visited the pools in town often as they were far nicer, much like the muscled attendants who greeted the guests. Mara however, aware of how easily Karigan tired, used her growing workload as an excuse to use the closer pools. Mara had nipped in to see Laren whilst Karigan slowly changed and asked her to fill in for her afternoon meetings; Laren assented, having instructed Mara to do just so if Karigan asked her for something.

The pools were well appointed, with a large centre pool and numerous smaller individual pools. They quickly rinsed in the bathing area before slipping off their robes by the edge. Karigan chose the larger pool to enter as there were plenty of steps, which meant less bending over. She also knew the pool had a bench she could sit on with her back to the wall. It was nice, feeling ordinary again. Mara was kind and entered the water first, allowing Karigan to enter at her own pace without exposing her back to Mara. There were several other women present engrossed in their various conversations. She leaned into the hot water and signed, her eyes blissfully closed. They were silent for several minutes when Mara burst into random laughter and promptly launched into a story about Tegan and Garth. Karigan giggled helplessly. As her laughter died down Mara looked around to check no other people they knew were present before gossiping about the deepening friendship she had noticed between the two, including the other night when Mara had walked passed the open barn and seen them in the corner…

Karigan listened wide eyed and carried on whispering with her friend. Before long, she realised they had the bathhouse to themselves. Mara had her eyes closed, enjoying the relaxing heat. It's now or never, she told herself nervously. She took a deep breath before plunging into her story. Mara listened intently as Karigan bared her heart and told Mara about her journey north. All of it. Including the king. At the end, Karigan turned around so Mara could see her scars. As she turned back, she saw tears working their way down Mara's cheek and in spite of their nakedness, she hugged Karigan. "I am so sorry," she said, wiping her eyes. Karigan felt light despite the darkness of their chat; it was cathartic to tell someone her story. "I don't know what to do," she confessed. "I am meant to go to Drent in my own time but I don't know that I can. Or want to. Will I be able to regain my strength? Or will it be a waste of time? If I don't go, then I have hope it might improve. But if I go and it doesn't…" She sighed. Mara looked at her squarely. "You have spent enough time wondering, it is time to make it happen. Tomorrow at 9 bells you report to Drent." Karigan paused, before cheekily replying, "Yes Captain!" Mara swatted her playfully with warm water and Karigan choked, which caused Mara to laugh harder. Feeling much better than she had in a long time, Karigan made her way to bed that night with hope in her heart.

Karigan fought down feelings of nervousness as she made her way to the training grounds where Drent stood watching several first year trainees. She stood behind him and cleared her throat. He turned and squinted at the sun behind her. "Hmmmm. The prodigal daughter has returned," he grunted. Karigan stood a little taller, wincing slightly. 'Reporting for training, sir!" "Hmmmmph" was all she got in return. Without preamble he turned and walked towards the training house. Karigan scrambled after him. He stopped walking once they reached his office and turned to face her, arms over chest. "Now, she has told me of your wounds," he said, "I expected to see you in my office before today." Karigan said nothing; what could she say? He looked at her for a minute, then said "turn around and pull your shirt up." Karigan did so without complaint and after another minute she finally heard, "that's enough, put your shirt down." Karigan turned to find him looking out the window in thought. After a few moments he came to a decision and stared her straight in the face. "You will report to the hot ring every morning at 8 bells. We begin now." Without another word he walked out of the office towards the heated training tent.

He rummaged through a barrel of wooden swords designed for new students. After a minute he found one to his satisfaction and handed it to her. She grasped it, surprised by how light her first training sword had been now that she was used to the weight of steel in her hands. "Show me basic patterns." Karigan obeyed, dismayed by how limited her ability to move really was. After a few rounds she was panting with exhaustion and pain. She stopped to rest. Drent looked thoughtful again. "Well, girl. We have a lot of work to do. I don't think you will make sword master again, but we can get you to a better level than this." Karigan nodded, unable to talk. Drent turned and walked out. Karigan looked down at her sword, running her fingers gently along its' length. "Well," she said with a resigned sigh, "you and I are going to get to know each other real well again."

In the days that followed Drent began with basic exercises to rebuild her muscle and fitness whilst teaching her to modify sword patterns to cope with the damaged muscle. She felt some improvement and was happy to continue her training in the hot ring; although it became unbearable as spring progressed into summer, the heat loosened her muscles and allowed her to train more easily. She found the pain after training lessened after a time and it became easier to move and sit. She was still in constant discomfort but at least walking was better. And she needed the physical relief because her new role as Chief Rider saw her in contact with the castle staff more frequently and that meant one thing. More contact with the king.

She walked more quickly to the baths. She was finding it increasingly difficult to keep thoughts of him out of her head. She was brought into important battle strategy meetings not infrequently, since she had so much experience with Mornhaven and now Second Empire. Sacoridia's forces were clashing often and had managed to maintain their front, pushing back Second Empire troops. It seemed Second Empire had lost some focus with the death of Grandmother. Victory was close.

She spoke in the meetings and avoided her king's eyes, knowing that his burning gaze was fixed on her. She managed not to stutter too often and was relieved to know that the king's military advisors had at least some respect for her. But still they were hard meetings to endure, knowing that he was so close, aware of his every word, the movement of his strong hands when he spoke emphatically, the way his eyes would circle the room in order to hide his need to watch her. It was both torture and a relief that her low status meant she was always the first to leave the room. But in the end, she mused, it was better for both of them.

Drent insisted that she attend the baths immediately after training each day to ensure her muscles were in the best condition. She was grateful but knew it was no kindness on his behalf; he was not impressed if she showed up the following day barely able to lift a sword, as had happened after her first few sessions. She entered and let out a groan of annoyance. Why was the woman's bath closed?! Peering around the corner, she saw that the pool was an odd green colour. Ick. Pausing in front of the room that both women and men could swim in, she cocked her heard and listened. She couldn't hear anyone. The pool must be empty. She wasn't interested in swimming with men as truth be told she was a bit scared of her own vulnerability in a compromising situation, but she really needed to jump in or risk the wrath of Drent.

Making a decision she entered the baths and washed quickly before walking to the largest pool. At least her ears still worked; there was only one other person hidden in the steam of one of the smaller pools at the back. Karigan hopped down the steps still clothed in her dressing robe, sighing as she always did when the water hit her back. She found a bench to sit on and leaned back with her eyes closed, starting to organise her tasks for the day. Tegan was to ride out after lunch and needed the final dossier and her packs, she needed to visit the quartermaster and organise uniforms for 3 riders due in within the week, payroll needed to be approved, several mended saddles had to be inspected before they were approved for use and re-issued; there was a lot to do today.

Karigan was peripherally aware that the other patron had entered her pool and felt the water near her ripple. She lazily opened her eyes. There, standing in front of her, was the king. She was shocked upright and hastily bowed her head in deference. "Your majesty!" She kept her eyes lowered; his bare chest at such close quarters was making her head swim. Or was it the dawning realisation that her dressing robe was terribly revealing when soaked wet. She couldn't tell.

"Hello Karigan," Zachary said quietly. His hand slowly snaked through the water to land gently on her own. She was so confused. This felt wrong and yet… Thinking back to their kiss up north sent a shiver through her spine. They had crossed a line and there was no going back; they were connected in a way she could not explain. She couldn't, wouldn't grasp his hand, but neither could she pull away. He moved closer to her. "How are you?" he asked softly. "I am well," she whispered. His eyes roved over her face and he seemed at a loss for words, content to just look at her. Her eyes darted to the side and she licked her lips. She saw Fastion hidden in an alcove and swore to have words with him later. Fat lot of use he was. He could have warned her the king was present. Then a thought hit her; he knew she would be here after her training and had hidden on purpose! Weapons!

"I uh…..I should probably get on with my day," she stammered. "You could stay for a few more minutes?" he suggested. Karigan was so very aware of his heat and was pretty sure he had figured out that drenched bath robes highlighted all the right places. Suddenly without knowing what possessed her, she threaded her fingers though his and heard his breath catch. It felt so natural. And with her last ounce of daring she lifted her head to meet his eyes and they gazed at each other for what felt like an eternity. Unbidden tears of forlornness crept into her eyes. She was so lonely. And he was married. She squeezed his hand for the briefest moment then bowed her head in deference and murmured, "Your majesty", wading towards the steps as quickly as she could. She got out without a backward glance and only after she had changed and made it back to the office did she loose a huge breath she hadn't realised she was holding. Damn it. Her bath better open soon or it was back to the far less adequate tub in riders' quarters.


	4. Chapter 4

As it turned out, far bigger things were at play and Drent was soon out of her head. The energy of the city was high as midsummer's eve approached and the festival to celebrate the royal births drew near. Nobility and clan leaders were invited to attend and the main ball was discussed in excited tones by both servants and attendees alike. Karigan grew more and more nervous as the time drew closer. One reason was minor; her father was due to attend as clan leader. Karigan hadn't told him about her injuries and was unsure how long it would go unnoticed. Coupled with what she assumed he would consider an excellent opportunity to review marriage prospects, it was enough to make her squirm.

The major reason she was distressed had nothing to do with the ball per se but the darkness she felt sure was approaching. Mornhaven had been a constant presence at the back of her mind ever since she had sent him to the future. She considered for a second. Maybe pressure was a better word. She couldn't describe it; she felt that he was there, but he wasn't, like he was watching and yet couldn't see through to her mind. He was like a veil draped over her head with a weight that spoke of its' existence without touching a single hair on the nape of her neck. Coupled with this, Laren had also confided to her that Lynx reported terrified animals along the Blackveil border, which seemed to indicate that he was in their timeline again. _But_ he had made no move if he was.

Karigan was uneasy; Mornhaven was nothing if not a showman and it was unlikely for him to re-enter their world and then do…nothing. As the ball approached her uneasiness swirled into dread and it was all she could think about. What event would give him the biggest stage to demonstrate his strength? Perhaps a ball where the country's noble and clan leaders joined to feast under a single roof? Karigan paced her office and tried to tell herself she was being silly. "Ughhh" she muttered in exasperation, "you have seen too many ghosts. Stop working yourself up over nothing." And then she stilled. Hmmm. She _was_ working herself up over nothing. Why would she be doing that? She had a lot of worries but the paranoia of her thoughts was not normal. The last time she had been this focused on Mornhaven was when he had taken control of her mind...

She dropped into a brief moment of full blown panic.

Try to think, she reasoned with herself, taking calming gulps of air. Last time you couldn't break free. This time, you have had practice with keeping monsters out of your head. She repeated this to herself and locked the door to her office. She grabbed the coat that was strewn over her chair and balled it into a headrest before laying on the ground. I have a strange life, she thought, as she prepared to make her way towards an imaginary meadow to find a white horse.

Seastaria was waiting for her and something was wrong. The beauty was agitated, flicking her mane and prancing. Her silhouette was blinding in front of thunderous clouds and the dark horizon. Karigan ran up to the mare. "He's coming, isn't he?" she demanded of the demigod. Seastaria reared in agreement, every muscle of her magnificent form outlined by the sinister sky. "Can you help me?" she asked desperately.

In answer the mare nudged her towards a bridge and Karigan sighed. Beyond it a world of white had appeared. Blast. She turned, "will you come with me?" In answer the mare ducked her head under Karigan's hand and led the way across the bridge. Karigan let out another sigh. She _really_ didn't like the white world. They cautiously made their way across the bridge and stepped through.

The white was blinding and it took a few seconds for Karigan's uncovered eye to adjust. She turned to look at Seastaria every so often as they walked, just to provide some visual relief for the mare glowed in the unnatural bleached landscape. They walked for what felt like an age.

Finally, a spot of green appeared, growing exponentially in size with each step they took. They halted underneath a single tree and Karigan felt her heart swell with joy. "Lil," she cried to the rider who sat underneath the green boughs. "It is wonderful to see you. Have the gods released you?!"

"Aye, Kari lass," she replied, producing an apple from her pocket. "Apparently my transgressions were not serious enough to hold their attention." She stared into the distance, nodding at the ominous black clouds. "I suspect that might be the reason why." Karigan gazed at the sky with a worried frown.

"Lil, something is happening. I have this...feeling inside or maybe outside of my head. I don't know. I don't think Mornhaven has control of my mind, but I _feel_ him." She stared at Lil imploringly, willing her to understand. Lil nodded.

"You have done well to seek out the Day horse as often as you have, since it is her that protects your mind from _his_ ," her chin jutted in the direction of the clouds, "influence. He is trying to reach you. He is drawn to you. But your protections are strong. Instead of controlling you he has given you warning that he is here and ready to finish what he started."

Karigan nodded, considering the implications of Lil's words. "What do we do?" Lil was silent for a moment before she spoke. "This is our last opportunity," she said seriously. "Folk in your time have lost magic lore and do not believe enough in or understand the threat. If we do not strike him down now there will be no other chance." She hesitated. "If Mornhaven becomes powerful enough he will have command over the dark forces. I think…I think perhaps the gods might be willing to step in if it comes to this. I have a plan. If it works we may well be rid of Mornhaven forever. If it doesn't," she trailed off thoughtfully.

Karigan drew in a breath. "If it doesn't then the gods spare us." Lil told Karigan the details of her trap. It wasn't much but it was more than nothing. And she would be placing a lot of reliance on gods that had never really gone out of their way to help before… Lil made a last comment before gripping Karigan's hand in a strong grasp. Karigan was startled at her touch, surprised that the white world gave Lil form. "You have come a long way lass and I am proud to serve with you. I wish you all the best luck but if not, who knows, I hope I may see you on the other side." Karigan shivered at the prospect but was humbled to be considered so by the First Rider. 'Same to you, Lil".

With that, she and Seastaria turned to head back through the white world and into the meadow. Just before she left she felt her blood sing with joy as Lil blew the Captain's horn and the rider call flowed through her veins. Karigan felt a renewed sense of purpose and gave Seastaria a last stroke, buoyed by the warmth and love the touch infused her with. She turned away from the advancing storm and quickly trotted back through the meadow in time to a rhythmic beating, leaving the corporeal world to re-enter her body.

To find her door being pounded on. Loudly. "Karigan, if you are in here and don't open the door this instance I am going to hunt down Drent!" Mara yelled. "Hang on, I'm coming," replied Karigan quickly. She got up as soon as her stiff body would allow and yanked open the door. Several riders stood outside.

"Why on earth didn't you open your door?!" asked Mara, exasperated. "We have been looking for you for hours. I was worried sick!" Karigan gripped Mara's arm and stared straight into her eyes, trying to convey the seriousness of her message. "Perhaps I could tell you, if you have time to visit the Colonel with me?" Mara blinked then nodded swiftly before dismissing the others and leading the way to Laren, who, mercifully, was between meetings.

"What can I do for you Mara?" enquired Laren. Mara stared at Karigan, who turned to face Laren.

"Colonel, it has come to my attention that Mornhaven," she hesitated, "might be trying to enter my mind. I think he will attack the castle on the night of the ball".

Laren stared. Mara stared. "Sit and start from the beginning Karigan...actually, can you poke your head outside and ask for a Runner first?" Karigan obeyed and was lucky enough to flag a young boy as he passed the door.

"Jake," the Colonel commanded, "please find Elgin and ask him to cancel my plans for this afternoon". Jake nodded and ran off to do as bidden. Karigan told them of her unease over the last few weeks and her actions up until visiting the meadow but hesitated to discuss the plan that she and Lil had concocted in front of Mara, staring at her out of the corner of her eye.

Laren took the hint and dismissed Mara, allowing Karigan to continue. Once she stopped talking Laren mulled over her news.

"Well, that is something." Laren stared off into the distance. Then she looked Karigan straight in the eye. "You do realise that if this doesn't go to plan, you will pay a big price." Karigan nodded. Really she had known all along, known from the moment she defeated Shawdell at a game of Intrigue and realised Mornhaven's strange connection to her. It would probably not end well for her. She sighed in resignation and Laren looked at her with sadness.

Laren remained silent for a few more moments, considering. "Are you ok to keep talking?" she asked. Karigan surprised herself with a yes. Clearly her afternoon with Seastaria had proven more restful than she realised.

"This is going to be difficult for you," Laren said seriously. "We need to speak to the king and I am aware that you two may have become…close during your recent mission." It was a statement, not a question.

Karigan blushed then looked to her superior officer. "Colonel, I was very unwell. The king gave me the comfort and strength I needed to heal, as did Estral and Enver. And I assure you that in no way would I see his marriage destroyed. But," she hesitated, 'this…this is going to be hard for him to understand. To accept."

Laren nodded thoughtfully before speaking. "I want you to know that I respect your situation. I think you realise that the stability of his marriage lends stability to the realm and that must not be compromised. But," she continued "I also want you to know that had there been any other way for you two, any way at all, I would have found it." Karigan's eyes watered and she blinked rapidly.

Despite the turmoil she grew calmer throughout the afternoon as they discussed all their available options, albeit in vain. Karigan had accepted that the prospect of meeting Lil in the afterlife was high as her role in this fight would be significant. After they finished speaking Laren sighed and stood. "Alright. Let's go speak to the king." Karigan followed her out of the study, butterflies crowding her stomach.

They were ushered into the king's study with a distracted, "enter". The king looked up and his gaze immediately softened on seeing Karigan. "Hello," he said with warmth. The women bowed and his expression grew sombre. They would never know how difficult it was for him to watch the painful genuflections of the two women he valued most in his life. It was his bitter lot as king to watch those he loved suffer for him and his country.

"Your majesty," Laren began. Then she hesitated.

Karigan had been debating the best approach to this conversation on their walk over and used the pause to set the tone of the conversation.

"Your majesty, I have been visited by the First Rider again," she said. Zachary looked at her with surprise and moved to take a seat in front of the small fire, indicating that they should also sit. After settling, Karigan continued.

"Sire, Lil has warned me that Mornhaven is back in our timeline and he is concentrating his forces ready for attack."

"How is it that she was in communication with you?" he asked, staring into the flames.

"She has been released by the gods and used an open channel to reach me. It appears Mornhaven may have been trying to enter my mind again, although I was able to keep him at bay," she rushed to finish as his gaze whipped toward her with concern. "Lil helped me to understand it as a warning; now that I have barriers in my mind he can't get to me but it does give us an opportunity to prepare".

"That it does," murmured Zachary after a pause.

Karigan hesitated. Now for the tricky part. "We don't know, your majesty" she began carefully, "when he might appear, but we are fairly certain that it will be before the end of summer and his forces may be great if the fight is not finished quickly".

Zachary considered this for a moment. "Do you think he will come himself?" He asked.

"Yes, I do," replied Karigan with conviction.

"What makes you so sure?" he asked curiously. "After all, he often sends the beasts of the forest to do his bidding."

Karigan reasoned for a moment. "It makes sense; there is almost no one that can directly defeat him, which will make him overconfident and after our last trick he will be in no mood for delaying this fight. And it would be dramatic, which is definitely his style." She laughed bitterly.

Zachary sighed. "It makes sense," he agreed. Turning to Laren he continued, "Colonel, ensure all your riders limit their errands to those of utmost importance only. We will want every available magic user present to deploy where needed."

Laren nodded, "Of course, sire. Now if you will excuse us."

"Yes of course," he murmured absently.

Laren and Karigan stood, then bowed to him and walked towards the door. As Karigan followed behind and walked past Zachary, she felt the soft heat of his warm hand brush against hers and for a fleeting second she slowed. He gripped her hand and then released it. She walked out of his study with a blush tinging her cheeks.

Laren turned to face her when they were outside, hands on hips, eyebrows raised. "Not quite the conversation I was expecting to have".

Karigan was quiet for a moment before responding. "You are right Colonel; about everything. I don't think providing more detail than that will assist us in accomplishing our plans. He can't know. He wouldn't let me go." Karigan was shocked to find her cheek held in Laren's palm for a moment. Then shaking her head wordlessly Laren walked back to her office. Karigan wandered over to the mess hall to find some green company, hoping to lift the gloom that had fallen over her day.


	5. Chapter 5

Karigan felt rather pulled about over the next few days. On top of her rider duties she also had to find time to attend to her clan duties. That is, to find something to wear to the ball that would not disgrace her father. Unfortunately for her she had left it rather late and with permission from Mara, spent an afternoon madly visiting various dressmakers in an attempt to find someone who would be willing to conjure a miracle in the short time allotted. One week was not long enough to make a gown by hand; she knew this, but she certainly _knew_ it after the fourth dressmaker turned her away.

Karigan sighed. She shouldn't be surprised really; her family, after all, traded in cloth, plus nearly every other noble had ordered an outfit, if the frantic shops were anything to go by. She had known the answer to her quest before she had even started. An idea struck her. Perhaps she could mend the blue dress that was, she thought with a grin, memorably redesigned by Drent's training session all those years ago? Yes, that could work. Her smile faded and she groaned. She hated mending.

Karigan was relieved to see that the dress wasn't as badly damaged as she remembered. After the laundry returned it the next morning, she and Mara spent several evenings around the rider commons fire stitching as quickly as they could. Karigan was surprised to find she was actually enjoying herself. She hated mending and her work was clumsy, but she liked that her friends would drop by, some happy to amuse themselves watching whilst others pitched in for a while. It was cosy. Which was important, as her connection to Mornhaven was slowly gaining strength and it was becoming more difficult to keep him at bay although as a frequent visitor to the meadow, she was doing the best she could.

The dress was finished and both women stopped to admire their collective handiwork. "It's a beautiful dress," said Mara with a sigh. Karigan looked at the hem and bit her lip. "Hmmm, it's not the best work but I don't think anyone will notice. Besides…" she trailed off, staring into the fire thoughtfully.

"…..besides?" hinted Mara, after a long pause.

"Hmmm?" Karigan said, turning her attention back to the dress.

"Gods, you're annoying sometimes," Mara muttered, yawning and stretching."Night!" Karigan was left to her thoughts after farewelling her friend, putting the fire to bed before doing the exact same thing herself.

The day of the ball dawned clear and bright. The castle was palpable with excitement. Laren and Karigan spent the morning reviewing their plan over and over before Laren excused her for the day. She headed to the baths for a long, hot soak in an attempt to loosen up her back before the nights' activities commenced. The pressure in her head grew steadily and she felt more and more nervous as afternoon gave way to dusk, her stomach in revolt. She could feel – no, smell – the magic on the air. It thrummed through her. Rider humans and horses alike were edgy, although no one really seemed to notice.

"Karigan?" Mara called down the hall.

"What's up?" she replied, her foot over the threshold of the door.

"Are you ready for me to help you get ready?"

Karigan thought quickly, calculating what she would need to put on first before she could let her friend in to help her dress. Mara would not be looking at her back tonight if she could help it. "Give me a few minutes to put my….things… on," she finished lamely as Fergal walked blithely by. Mara giggled.

Karigan entered her room and as quickly as she could, stripped off her clothes and painstakingly dressed in her smalls and the silk shift that was to fall underneath her backless dress. She was relieved again to have thought of ripping off the back of the corset and replacing it with silk. It looked strange but there was no way she could wear a corset. She would just have to leave her cloak on. With not a moment to spare Mara barged her way in and set about dressing Karigan, chatting as she did her hair and makeup. Karigan was distracted but tried hard to gossip with her friend.

Mara was very pleased with the final result and laughed when she saw the additions Karigan had made to her outfit; a pair of throwing knives hid between her thighs. Mara cocked her eyebrow. "Well, if you don't want to take a man home all you need to do is say thank you for a lovely evening but no thank you." Karigan snorted before dropping her skirts to the floor, adjusting her eye patch and gathering her invitation from the dresser. She was strangely relieved to hear the oooohs and aaaaahhhhs of the female riders as she passed in the common room and curtseyed; at least the dress had patched up ok.

She was dressed early and Mara escorted her to the guest suites where her father had arrived the day before. Karigan had not been happy to see her father. Well, she was glad to see him of course; but she did not want her father anywhere near what could end up being a mass funeral. And to complicate matters, she had not spoken to him about her recent injuries so it was difficult to act unfazed in front of him, especially when he touched her, which he was wont to do after their long absences. Her back was still sore from the big hug he had given her yesterday. At least she had taken her dress to show him; after a bit of complaining over the creases he was making, he had let go of her quick enough. Her lips turned up at the memory of his big smile and hearty laugh.

A thud on the door and a few seconds later Stevic opened it to admit Karigan. "Karigan" he breathed, "You look as beautiful as your mother ever did". Karigan blushed. "Thanks," she murmured with pleasure.

"Your daughter sure knows how to scrub up when she wants to," chimed in Mara, drawling out the last words.

Stevic winked at her, "she learned from the best!" They all laughed.

"Well, now I have done my duty I better head back to barracks. Fergal is supplying ale tonight and I volunteered for quality control! I know, I know, I can't help being the selfless soul I am," Mara lamented, her hand thrown dramatically across her forehead. Karigan's smile faulted and she hugged her friend around the neck tightly. Mara looked at Karigan quizzically. "Don't worry I won't drink that much. I'll see you after the ball, have fun!" She waved at them both and left.

Stevic, musing on the strange ways of women, gathered his daughter under his arm. "Ready?" he asked. She took in a deep breath. "Ready," she nodded firmly.

They made their way to the ballroom and her nerves started to war with panic. Karigan gulped. Hard. What if she couldn't do this? What if…. She shook her head and smiled grimly. If she could deal with Nyssa, she could deal with Mornhaven.

Neff announced their arrival and she felt a little relieved when firstly, no one paid too much attention to them and secondly, she saw that the king had not yet arrived. She spent a few minutes on her father's arm as he met old friends. Seeing men and women who had smiled at her countless times since her childhood only further served to knot her stomach with anxiety as she was faced with yet another reminder of what they had to lose if Mornhaven won.

Fending off a rather indelicate question with regards to her lineage plans, Karigan excused herself the moment she spotted Alton. He brightened as she walked towards him. "Karigan, it is wonderful to see you!" Karigan smiled. "How did you convince the Colonel to release you from the wall?!" Alton laughed nervously. "Well, Estral pulled rank and arrived with minstrels and their various scrolls so I can't do much there at the moment. She is hoping to spend more time on the song. My father pulled rank on behalf of the clan. So here I am!" He tugged on his collar unconsciously, unused to formal dress after years at the wall base camp. Karigan made a split decision and grabbed his hand. "Come with me", she muttered and they made their way towards the balcony that had been such a memorable part of every ball experience Karigan had ever had at the castle. She turned to face him, her expression serious.

"Do you feel it?" she demanded. Alton blanched before replying without hesitation, "I feel like my body is on fire, like every nerve is on edge. What's happening?" Karigan stared at him hard. "Alton, I think tonight might be the night that Mornhaven comes." She gazed out at the blank night. "No, I don't think it. I _know_ it; he's coming, Alton". Alton paled, matching Karigan's countenance. Her back was aching with tension. "What do we do?" Karigan thought for a moment; Laren may have insisted on secrecy but Alton's ability was to shield, which may prove useful. Plus it couldn't hurt to have extra allies tonight, right? "I don't know Alton but I think…I think I am going to need your help". She told him her plan. Hah, plan was the wrong word. A very wrong word. Since it implied that she knew what she was doing. Brief outline might be better.

At that moment the trumpets sounded. The main event. Karigan gripped Alton's arm again as he moved towards the ballroom. "Be ready," she whispered. He gripped her hand tightly and nodded, lingering for a moment before making his way through the doors to stand with the crowd. The king and queen entered with their Weapons and the ballroom fell to its knees as one. As the queen bowed her head to the crowd on her right, the king used these precious seconds to scan the room. He could not see her. His heart fell slightly when he realised what he was doing and moved his gaze straight to the balcony doors. Of course she was there. And of course she was breathtaking. Her beauty never ceased to move him, and he suspected it never would. Love and longing made her attractive to him in a way no other ever woman would; despite being a man of the world and temperate in his opinions on fate and fortune, he was quite firmly sure that she was the only woman he could ever love.

Karigan rose with the crowd and caught the king staring straight at her. She held his gaze for a moment before dipping her head in respect. When she rose her head the couple had begun greeting their guests. Karigan released a trembling sigh; so much was at stake tonight.

The banquet hall burst with merriment and music as the ball officially began. Karigan checked in on her father every so often but tried mainly to keep to the edges of the room, prepared at any moment. She saw Alton mingle with guests close to the king and the Weapons were as ever on guard. The king was in the centre of the ballroom whirling his partner to a spirited song whilst onlookers cried with delight and the other couples energetically matched his pace. Karigan's watchful eye did not falter.


	6. Chapter 6

The noise and heat pressed in on Karigan, adding to the crushing pressure that was building inside her head. She quickly lurched out onto the balcony again to gasp for air, leaning over and clutching the rail. The pressure. She didn't know how much longer she could take it before her skull burst. She closed her eyes and concentrated on slowing her breathing. The music softened over a few songs into a waltz and the fresh air gradually helped to subside the throbbing in her skull to a dull pressure. Karigan loosed a sigh, relaxing her shoulders and turning to re-enter the hall, when hands wrapped around her arms. She whipped around to find herself in the kings embrace.

"Your majesty!" she said, startled, before dipping into a curtsey. He stared into her eyes and she blushed. "Karigan, you are so beautiful," he whispered, dropping his hands. She trembled but said nothing. After a moment he stepped back and bowed. "I had wanted to ask you to dance tonight, but I know how difficult it would be for you in the ballroom with your back. So I thought perhaps; might you consider finishing the waltz with me out here?"

She stared at his hopeful gaze. "Uh…I…" was all she could get out at first. Her blush heightened. Say something, she thought to herself furiously. "I would be honoured, your majesty".

He wrapped his arms around her gently in the style used when couples were intimate. This way, she didn't have to raise her arms. Her eyes watered at his simple gesture of kindness just as her heart fluttered at being so close to the man she loved. They began a very slow version of the waltz, ever aware of her injuries. He was so gentle, so loving, his eyes never leaving her face. She was overwhelmed; she felt guilt for Estora, ecstasy at his touch, despair at the inevitability of their parting, and desperately unhappy and fed up over this constant emotional battle. The song came to a close and the king stilled, unwilling to let her go.

All of a sudden Karigan felt as sluggish as she had in her childhood when wading through the ocean currents of Corsa. Her movements were fragmented. The pressure in her head rapidly grew thunderous again and she stared up at the foreboding sky above. He's here, she thought to herself grimly. She could barely move now. The wind picked up speed and she watched as plants toppled over and flurries descended to tear the earth. Her mind screamed at her fingers, begging them to reach her brooch faster as she forced her arm ever so slowly upwards. Moments later her brooch glowed with warmth at her touch. The world became grey and she felt her movements speed up as she returned to her normal timeline. Thanks, she thought with surprise to whichever ghost or god had helped break the spell. About time they helped her, really.

She closed her fist over her brooch, grabbing the king at the same time. He unfroze instantly and stared at the grey world around him as whirls of shrieking winds blew out the candles in the ballroom where his unmoving guests stood stranded in darkness. "Karigan, what's happening?" he whispered. "Mornhaven", she whispered back. He grasped her hand tighter. "Sire, come quickly."

She dragged him to where Fastion stood rooted to the ground and touched him as well. For a moment he seems perplexed before he realised who must be standing in front of him. "Karigan?" he whispered to the empty space in front of him. She took his hand. "Fastion, it's time to play your part. You know what to do. But first, grab Alton's hand." Zachary stared at her in confusion as Fastion fumbled for Alton, waking him up through their unbroken human chain.

"What do you mean? We need to prepare ourselves and protect our people." She ignore the king and quickly pulled them along until they reached Estora, releasing her from the spell as well. Estora blanched. "What is happening?" she whispered, as Karigan let go of her targets and dropped her powers to save her strength.

"Don't worry your majesty, we have a plan, but for it to work and save everyone here, you and the king need to be out of sight. It is imperative or this won't work."

After a seconds' more hesitation Zachary nodded and Fastion led Estora out of sight first, followed by Alton who was whispering under his breath as he erected a shield around her. "Do you know what you're doing?" Zachary whispered. Karigan nodded firmly. "Be careful," he said quietly with a final glance at her. "I can't lose you." Before she could reply he kissed her swiftly and then followed Estora through the passage behind one of the hidden tapestries.

Karigan scanned the crowd and located Laren standing next to her father. Swallowing a lump in her throat, she snaked her away across the room. Laren, although herself under the same spell, seemed to have a better range of movement than the rest of the crowd, no doubt owing to her own magic. Karigan felt for her own badge again and touched Laren, who straightened. "We need to get out of here," Karigan said without preamble. "We have to draw this fight away." She avoided looking at her father, fearing the torrent of grief if she did. Laren nodded brusquely.

The air was thundering; huge winds had built up during her quick exchange with the king and the window panes were shaking furiously. They scrambled back to the balcony, fighting hard to win every step as the unnatural gale worsened with each passing second. Karigan tagged Donal on their way but he didn't move a muscle. Looks like my luck's run out, she thought. Just great. An old rider and a wounded rider is not the most inspiring combination. And finally, as they staggered back onto the balcony, that little thought she had kept buried at the back of her mind, that she hadn't truly made peace with after all, burst to the surface. "Goodbye," she whispered with a sob, thinking of her father, her aunts, her king. Laren and her, they weren't coming back from this.

They managed to head down the steps to the garden below, the wind howling and tearing at their clothes. The airy tendril was searching and hungrily ripped into the gaps of their outfits. Its' ethereal fingers had been seeking another prey, a man whom their master wanted to play with. But when it touched _her_ skin, tasted _her_ sweat and fear and essence, the longing of their master grew wild and his need for her sent it into a frenzy. It grasped her hair and smothered her flesh, frantic to cover every inch of her with its' cold breath. The woman next to her was in the way, the wind heard from its' master. It cocooned around her in a ball, tighter and tighter, and flung her across the grass. Now their master's true prize was alone. The wind could feel the displeasure of their master as the girl shrieked with pain, her face grimacing. The master was angry that she should be so discomforted and the wind howled at his bidding, forming a hurricane around the girl so she stood protected in the eye of the maelstrom.

Tears dripped down Karigan face as she lay on the grass moaning. The tension in her head and the pain in her back were unbearable and she knew she couldn't last a moment longer. It must end. Then all of a sudden, the wind stopped. She clutched her head and gradually realised the pain had…gone. She blinked in disbelief and clumsily got to her feet. "It has been some time," came a slow, measured voice, thick with an accent long past. Karigan stared at the guest she had been waiting for all night, an involuntary shiver passing through her body at the sight of his dreaded face. "Hello," she replied to Mornhaven.

They stared at each other. Mornhaven tutted. "You are not looking so well these days, Galadheon". All of a sudden Karigan felt her body turning against her will and to her absolute shock, the carefully mended dress disintegrated off her body and motes of fabric flew into the air. Her brooch fell to the ground. She was completely naked, her body bared to her captor. Mornhaven was silent for a moment, his eyes dark in contemplation. Karigan stood stock still. "You know, I offered you a place by my side long ago. I will offer this to you once more. Perhaps I can give you a more enticing offer now?" All of a sudden Karigan stood straight. All her injuries were gone! She couldn't believe it. Her hands raked the back of her neck and she felt her skin whole and complete. She couldn't remember the last time she had been pain free. His hold over her ceased and she whipped around to face him, quickly picking up her brooch and landing in a fighting stance.

Mornhaven laughed. "I give you freedom, and this is how you answer me? Why must you always be so difficult?!" Karigan ground her teeth and then spat at the ground in front on him. "I will never stand by your side Mornhaven! My name might be Galadheon but it is not Hadriax". He stopped laughing and she held her breath. All of a sudden the wind exploded into a frenzy and she held her arms up to protect her face, fighting to keep her eyes on his form. He stepped forward and whipped his arms around her in a tight embrace. She gasped as the familiar pain arched in her back again and she struggled in his grip. "You will be mine, or you will die. And your king will watch you".

Zachary suddenly appeared on the grass next to them, frozen mid-pace at the moment when Mornhaven had plucked him from Fastion's place of hiding. His eyes followed her, wild with anger and worry. She glanced back to Mornhaven and looked him dead in the eye. "You do not own me. I am not yours'. He tightened his grasp on her as his eyes filled with hot rage and his skin started to glow. She only had a few seconds before she followed the fatal path that had ended Yates' life.

"Now!" she screamed as her brooch blazed in her clenched fist. She felt the veil of time thin as Lil rode though, followed by dozens of riders from years and millennia past. Mornhaven let her go. "What is happening?" he demanded as riders shrieked around him in a maelstrom of hatred, thrusting their ghostly spears into any part of him that they could. As the ghosts took his full attention for a few precious moments, Karigan felt the veil slip further and a magnificent black horse appeared, as dark as the days were never ending.

"Mount!" a thunderous voice reverberated in her head. Karigan glanced into Salvistar's eyes and saw a thousand stars shining back at her and then she was on top of her saddle, dressed in star armour. Mornhaven shrieked with rage. "You are no more," Karigan heard herself say with the voice of a god layered over her own. Without pause Salvistar leapt forward and Karigan plunged her halberd into the centre of Mornhaven's head, cleaving his body in half. His outrage were cut short and the wind ceased. One moment of stillness crept into another and then his body drifted down into dust.

Using her other hand she plunged her sword towards his remains to capture the tatters of his soul. His screams became audible only to those who walked within the spirit world. A second later she was standing before the seal in the castle tombs and the magical writings strained against the metal in their eagerness to take the prisoner that the gods were so angry with. Karigan could hear the faint shrieks of the damned ensconced in that prison, desperate to get out. Mornhaven continued incoherently, occasionally managing to string enough words together to insist he was the One True God. Without further ceremony or acknowledgment she pushed his soul onto the seal with her sword tip and watched as it absorbed him into the hell that lay below. She tapped her sword against the seal to imbue it with further protections that the gods had ordered with this particular prisoner in mind.

"It is done," Karigan thundered and a second later she was back on the grass dismounting, standing naked before Salvistar. She leaned in to stroke his cheek and was filled with the understanding of why the gods had finally decided to intervene. Then Salvistar whickered and stepped back through the veil, followed by the riders who had brought her a precious piece of time just when she needed it the most. Some of them waved to her in passing. Before long the last of the ghosts were through and she was face to face with Lil.

"Thank you," Karigan breathed. "I could not have done this without you". Lil chuckled. "Well, it seems the gods were sick of listening to me banging on and decided to put a stop to it. Can't say I blame them. It was a good ride," she said, staring wistfully at the few ashes of Mornhaven's corpse that remained. She looked up at Karigan and her face broke into a smile, startling Karigan, who had never seen Lil look so peaceful. "Lass, you are a credit to your king and country. I feel sure we will meet again, in one shade of the world or another. It has been an honour serving with you". Karigan reached to pat Lil's shoulder and her hand met cold air. They smiled at each other. "Thank you", she whispered as Lil turned to enter the veil and their timeline returned to normal.


	7. Chapter 7

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!! Thanks for reading, I'm really enjoying your reviews.

For the third time in the garden that night she was engulfed in someone's arms. "You are going to be the death of me!" the king whispered hotly into her neck, kissing her over and over. Karigan embraced him fiercely and said "I'm ok," before suddenly freezing in place. "What's wrong?" the king asked, before widening his eyes in understanding. Turning around immediately he unfastened his blue cloak and handed it to her so she could clothe herself. Satisfied she was decent, he turned around, red in the face. They heard a groan and rushed to where Laren had been thrown, helping her to sit up.

"Karigan, what happened? I saw Mornhaven and then…I don't know." Karigan quickly filled in the blanks whilst Laren listened with a smile spreading over her face. "I cannot believe it! After all this time and with the odds we faced. Thank the gods! I cannot believe it!" They all grinned. Then Laren's eyes softened.

"I am truly sorry for all you have been through, and I want you to know how proud we all are of you."

Karigan turned red as Laren leaned in confidentially. "And….blue is a good colour on you". I'm not red, Karigan thought. I'm a beetroot.

The king interrupted them both with a stern gaze. "We will have words later. I am starting to suspect that your plan involved hiding me all along instead of allowing me to protect my people." Both women levelled calm expressions at him and said nothing.

Noise drew their attention to the ballroom guests since it was clear that everyone had now unfrozen. Mayhem reigned. They walked to the balcony and the king re-entered the scene to calm his guests.

Laren was about to follow him when she heard Karigan gasp. Turning she saw Karigan swaying, her face pale. "What is it?" she asked urgently, lunging forward to catch the sinking rider. "Can you feel Mornhaven? Is he back?!" Karigan shook her head in shock and Laren followed her gaze down to her upturned palm. She looked at Karigan quizzically before the incredulous truth dawned on her. It couldn't be.

She knelt next to Karigan and gently asked, "Karigan, what are you looking at?" Laren could see that she held a perfect, golden horse brooch, the Green Rider token that symbolised the magic abilities that bound the messenger service together. After a long moment Karigan looked up. "Nothing," she whispered, her voice breaking. "I can't see a thing."

Karigan _felt_ the moment when the world around her changed forever. Looking back, it wasn't surprising. She had never really thought about it but she was one of the stronger magic users in the service. She was an Avatar for a god, after all. She had heard the common room gossip that when riders no longer heard the call, their badges looked like pretty blobs of metal, much as others must see them. So after years of gossip, Karigan had never expected the change in her mind as well; she had _felt_ the power shift in her before it disappeared, like a heavy coat had been whipped from her shoulders, leaving her weightless and bereft. And after the dizziness had passed she had looked down to see a pretty bauble in her hand. "No", she moaned as the full force of what this meant dawned on her. Her service was over. The gods were done with her. She was no longer a green rider.

Karigan stared at Laren, whose eyes mirrored equally her own shock. "I am sorry, Colonel," she said, her voice trembling. "I must…." She couldn't trust herself to finish the sentence. Laren loosed a long sigh and helped Karigan to her feet, squaring her so they were eye to eye. "Karigan," she said firmly, "I have never been more proud of a rider in my service than I am of you. Each day you have answered the call with every ounce of your ability, no matter the sacrifice. The king and I are forever in your debt. It is time you and Condor went home and you will do so with the every honour this service can bestow."

Tears ran down Karigan's face. "Thank you for everything you have done for me," she whispered. "I think I need my father now". Slowly, she handed the brooch to Laren. Laren looked at the horse with sadness before replying, "of course, I'll find him for you." She saw Laren corner Stevic in the crowd as he searched frantically for his missing daughter. He approached hurriedly, concern and relief etched on his face in equal measures as he saw her.

"Kari love, what has happened?! Are you hurt?" He made to grab her in a tight hug but stopped in confusion when he realised what she was wearing. "I'm going home with you," she replied wearily. Stevic stared at her in astonishment. "What did you say?"

Karigan wanted to scream at him, did not want to explain that she had been rejected by the service she lived for. She took a deep breath. "My….calling, has released me. I can go home." Stevic was ecstatic to hear this long wished-for moment but also stunned. It was clear that his daughter was very unhappy about the loss and he had never expected it to be so abrupt. He said nothing, but took her gently into his arms as she choked on a sob. He felt her stiffen slightly and he released her, sighing. One day, he might hear her secrets. Although deep down, when he spent hours alone in his study ruminating over his daughter, he suspected he did not want to hear her stories and a chill always gripped his gut.

They left the hall together and she made her way to Mara to tell her the news. Mara was in the common room drinking and looked up with a questioning glance as Karigan entered. Karigan explained the nights' events quickly, watching as Mara's face seemed to move through every expression possible. In another time it actually would have been quite comical. When Karigan finally stopped talking Mara stared open mouthed before bursting into tears. They cried together for many minutes. More people joined them, each one exclaiming their surprise as loud as the next as they heard of Karigan's imminent departure. Karigan drew her sleeve over her eyes as Mara stared into the fire. "When do you leave?" she asked. "Tomorrow," Karigan replied softly. She would ask her father to leave in the morning. She could not bear to be with her rider family and not be a rider. Mara sighed. "Well, at least Mornhaven is gone". They stared at each other as those words sunk in before dissolving into gales of hysterical laughter.

Garth ran off as the others absorbed this and soon understanding flowed through the crowd. After a few minutes he shuffled back in with a couple of the trainees, carrying what looked like half the leftovers from the ball, from both the food and drinks table. Within minutes the riders had set up an impromptu ball of their own and the common room was full of mirth. "Right!" Garth cried over the revellers, "as our dear Karigan is moving to greener pastures, it seems only fitting that we drink to her health, drink to her wealth, and thank her kindly for getting rid of Mornhaven!" There were peals of laughter at his speech and a few of the riders picked up instruments. After a couple of hours of dancing, laughing and the best of company, Karigan hugged Mara and Garth and put herself to sleep, thinking that for all she would miss this she couldn't think of a luckier woman to have friends like these and to have been a part of all their adventures. She tucked herself in next to Ghost Kitty and slept better that night than she had in years.


	8. Chapter 8

Karigan groaned and eased her fingers down her sides. That had been an intense session. Corsa may not have all the attraction's the city boasted but it sure had its' fair share of arms masters. Sword training was as much a part of her as her hands were; she would not give it up, even though she could still only just manage to complete a basic level session. Sadly sword mastery was a dream that belonged to someone else in her past. She had at least the company of a friendly local sword master, Fynn, who Karigan had chosen specifically because of his gentleness and discretion. Of course, she had needed to show him her injuries so he could modify her training and she had been relieved that his face had been free of pity.

It had been a long two years of recovery and her improvement was minimal. But she had not gotten worse, for which she was very thankful. She barely thought much of the pain anymore. It was her constant companion but she had learned to manage it and hide as much of her discomfort as she could from her family. They had long ago stopped pestering her and just accepted it now. Well, they accepted that further discussion would end in a giant row like every other time. Which was fine in her opinion.

She packed up her gear and washed in the basin just outside her fathers' stables before heading inside to review the recent shipment inventory with Stevic and Sevano. After they discussed part of their trading plan for the summer, they lunched together before she parted for her office. Although her mornings were dedicated to her father, her afternoons were dedicated to her green rider work.

She had vanished the morning after the ball, taking her leave of Laren after a heart wrenching meeting. She had not seen or spoken to the king. She could not. After the winter had passed and the roads once again became traversable a letter had arrived by post, inviting her to be a senior designer for Laren's lifelong dream of building a countrywide network of green rider messengers. It was not the only letter she had received that day. Oh no. The bundle of letters tied with red ribbon, tucked safely under her bed, told a story familiar to most young girls whose mothers wove stories of lovers through their dreams.

And so Karigan had dedicated her afternoons to building up the coastal component of the service. She had to admit, it had been a stroke of genius on Laren's part. Karigan still felt that she was part of the green rider community even without her brooch or the calling, and it was nice to work in the messenger service without the fear of stabbing. Or torture. Or Eletians.

Karigan eased back in her chair and dropped her quill with a sigh of contentment. After the fallout from the death of Mornhaven, they had both been surprised by how eagerly Sacoridia has taken to this network. It had spread rapidly and with enthusiasm, entrenching the riders as a profession respected by the public. Many new riders were employed, many of them non-magic users, and trade was flowing more freely than ever. It had certainly boost her reputation or perhaps vice versa, especially as she was now famous for her role as the Vanquisher, which her father seemed to enjoy the fruits of immensely. Or at least his accountants did.

She had thrown herself into the project and took great pleasure in seeing the network develop although she still refused to join the senior team in the castle. She liked being back in the salt air and thought it best to remain apart from the core rider group at the castle. The riders who were still called magically to the service remained sequestered at the castle in order for the king to use their abilities, and she didn't want to be among them. It would hurt too much. At least in her current post she was useful.

Karigan turned her thoughts from the castle and those who dwelt there as someone rode into the stable below and a horse humphed. Karigan peered out of the window and smiled wryly. Her daily visitor. Richard was the son of a competing merchant whom she had reconnected with a few months earlier after her lengthy absence from clan life. They had discovered a mutual love of horses and the ocean at a dinner hosted by his father where they were seated together. He had begun to visit her fairly frequently and she enjoyed his company. Her smile faltered. She liked him and she was fairly certain he was interested in her. Their fathers were certainly encouraging of the match. However….. Her thoughts still turned to _him_. Even more so since Estora had passed away a year and a half ago. She mused. She had thought the passage of a few years would cause her affection to wane and it had certainly helped. But still, she could see Richard dismounting fluidly and when his countenance moved in just this way, or just that, she saw an echo of the king and her pulse quickened. She shook her head. Gah, it was all so complicated.

"Karigan?" she heard him call as he bounded up the stairs, bowing ornately at the entrance of the open door. "Richard, how are you?" she smiled at him. "Well, I am ready for our ride, although you don't seem to be!" he replied, quirking his eyebrows at her. "Sorry, I got caught up designing this new station in Timbal". He rolled his eyes good naturedly. "Honestly, if you're not too careful you will have a station in every town that has two buildings!" She smiled cheerfully. "That's the plan! If you head down I'll grab my things'. He nodded and trotted down the steps, whistling. Once he had left the room she slowly propelled herself out of the chair, grimacing. Together they rode down to the beach to enjoy the sunset as it fell over the glorious azure ocean.

They stopped near the rock pools and she gazed at the sea contentedly, relishing the sounds of the waves lapping gently in tune to the gulls. She found Richard staring at her. Feeling heat rise to her cheeks, she turned Condor back towards the house. He caught up with her. "I know a secret about the dinner tomorrow night!" She glanced over to him, smiling at his playful manner. "Never fear brave sir, I would not pry a secret from a gentleman." He laughed. "Someone very important is attending. Someone who is very interested in the impact of the current trade negotiations with the islands." Karigan snorted. After years in the castle she did not consider the local mayor of major importance. However, Richard would neither confirm nor deny the identity, so they spent the remainder of their ride playfully fighting over who the mystery guest was. They parted at her gate and she went inside to settle Condor for the night. "Did you enjoy your ride boy?" Condor lipped her gently on the shoulder and she laughed, blowing him a goodnight kiss.

She washed her hands and headed into the kitchen where her aunts and father were sitting. They gossiped good naturedly about their day over dinner and Karigan discussed the new station. Conversation naturally steered towards the banquet the following night and her aunts let their approval of Richard be known. Forcefully.

"Well, Kari," said her father, wiping his mouth before throwing down the cloth. "Looks to me that young Richard will be plenty pleased to see you there tomorrow night. He looked happy when he rode off tonight!" He gave her a big smile and she squirmed in her seat.

"Maybe, I haven't really thought about it," replied a blushing Karigan.

"He's a fine young man," said Stace, "with a fortune to match your father."

"More importantly, we can all tell he cares for you deeply," added Brini kindly. Karigan moved plates to the sink, using the opportunity to hide her face from her family.

"I'm sure he will make you very happy if you wed and hopefully our home will be filled with the laughter of many grandchildren!" Gretta laughed.

Karigan stilled and closing her eyes, took a deep breath. She turned around. "You never know!" she said with forced cheerfulness. She blinked rapidly to stop her unshed tears. "Now I best get my beauty sleep. Night all," she kissed her father and each of her aunts goodnight but before she could finish embracing Tori, her aunt gave her a penetrating glance. Karigan quickly turned away and headed upstairs to her room.


	9. Chapter 9

Although her grief over Cade had subsided many moons ago, she still found herself assuaged by his absence from time to time when his memory floated into her consciousness at random moments. Now, grief over both him and the king overwhelmed her as she sat in her bathing room, the steam mingling with her tears. After she had cried herself out, she continued to let the soothing water stream over her body for some time. Eventually she felt cleansed and enough heat had passed over muscles to make her as comfortable as possible. She dried herself gently and found her bathrobe. She sighed cathartically and walked out of the shower room and into her bedroom, expecting to hit frigid air. The nights were still cold this close to the ocean. To her surprise a warm fire was burning in the hearth. Surprised because firstly, the servants knew not to go near her room at night and secondly, because there was Tori, building the fire.

Tori turned on her heels after a moment. "If your father knew that you went to sleep at night in this cold, he would fire every servant we have," she said sternly. Karigan stumbled over her words. "I know but…I would prefer….I asked them not to come in here. I just make it myself, I promise. Plus it's starting to get warm at night, I don't really need one." Her traitorous body shivered involuntarily in the chill. Tori stood, brushing her hands from the soot and faced Karigan squarely. "Enough. I realise that we have had this conversation many times before, but enough. It is time you confided in one of us. If you don't want to talk to me that is fine. But you need to talk to someone. This silence is straining our family." Karigan sighed, chewing the side of her lip. Her aunt was right; she had noticed the increased bickering amongst her family and it was always worse when her back was particularly bad. She walked towards the fire in thought, ordering her thoughts.

"I'm not sure if I want to marry," Karigan murmured quietly. Tori nodded in understanding. "None of us has married lass, we understand more than most why you might feel that. Your father might be disappointed for a time but he will come around, he loves you." Karigan shook her head and sighed. "No, it's more than that. It's not that I don't want to be with someone," she blinked rapidly, "it's just that….I can't. I am unable to be a wife, I don't have the ability." Her aunt hissed in surprise. "Kari, lass, that is the daftest thing I have ever heard you say. Any man would love you as a wife. I mean, young Richard…" She stopped as Karigan held up her hand gently. "Aunt Tori, it's not that I don't want to. I just don't have the ability to…have children. No one would want me, or at least, no one that has to worry about their inheritance plans." Tori stared at her. "But child, you are young. What makes you say that?"

Karigan smiled bitterly. "Because I was a green rider". At Tori's questioning glance, Karigan began to talk about her time as a green rider although she kept many things to herself, her eye one of them. When she finished, the grandfather clock chiming downstairs told her it was almost morning. Karigan fed the flames for the fourth time. Finally Tori spoke. "Child, I am so sorry for everything you have been through and I am glad that you have trusted me enough to share your story. But I still don't really understand. To me, it seems like marriage might be the best thing for you, someone to hold you when the memories threaten to overwhelm you. Why don't you think you are capable of being a wife, that you don't deserve this?"

She was very gentle and Karigan swallowed. Perhaps she just needed to get on with it. At least one of her aunts should know. "Let me show you," she replied softly. And with that, Karigan opened her gown and dropped it to the floor to reveal her naked body, letting the lamplight shine on her bare skin. Her aunt's eyes rounded at the sight of Karigan's body pocketed with scars from old injuries and stab wounds. She stood, approaching. "Kari," she breathed. Karigan turned. She heard her aunts' intake of breath as she stilled in shock. Karigan stood there for a full minute before she turned and slowly put her gown back on. Finally she looked at her aunt and sighed as she read the pity and horror on Tori's white face. "My body is too weak to birth," she said quietly. "I cannot be the woman a man would want at night, or bear him heirs. Mornhaven and Second Empire had the last laugh and took that from me. So, now you know everything that I can tell you." Her aunt just stood there, unmoving, tears falling down her face. Karigan grew nervous as the silence unfolded until Tori seemed to snap out of her reverie and leaned in to clutch Karigan fiercely, but gently. "Oh child," was all she said. For once Karigan leaned into her aunts' embrace, feeling drained but calm. It was nice to have shared her burden with someone.

Eventually they moved apart and Tori wiped her eyes. "It is almost dawn, but I think you need a good sleep. Head to bed and rest now. I will wake you for the midday meal." Karigan yawned in response and nodded, drowsy after her late, emotional night. She climbed into bed and her aunt tucked her in, smoothing Karigan's forehead as she drifted off. Tori watched her niece, noticing the lines she had always thought of as sadness melt away as the constant pain she must feel drifted away with sleep.

Tori shut the door quietly and went down to the kitchen. She stoked the hearth fire and set the kettle on to boil, preparing the teapot in deep thought. The kettle whistled and she poured the steaming water over the leaves, setting them aside. She was staring out the window, having drunk half a cup, when she heard quiet noises in the hallway and the door opened to admit Stevic. He was startled to see her; he was almost always the first of the household to wake. "Morning Tori. Poor sleep? It's unlike you to be awake already." She sighed and leaned over to grab another cup. "That would be because I have not yet seen my bed. Have a seat, Stevic." He looked at her with startled eyes and sat while he sipped on the hot tea. Tori was lost again in a train of thought, her eyes arrested by the fire. Stevic gently placed a hand on hers to gain her attention. "What's on your mind?" he asked. Tori took a deep breath.

"I think we all know that Kari's service to the king was difficult and we have all agreed that there is much we suspect she hadn't told us. Well, we were right. Last night she told me her story. Oh, Stevic!" she cried, grasping both of his hands in hers tightly. "She is a miracle! Our little girl is the reason our neighbours can sit in their homes this morning and drink tea, the reason you can organise your trade schedule this season! She saved us all! And she saved our children, and our children's' children. But the price she paid… Brother, her body is scarred. Like nothing you have ever seen. She has paid this price for us dearly." Taking a sip of tea for composure whilst her brother sat in silence, Tori clasped her brother's hand again and in a calmer manner, unfolded Karigan's story.

Much like Karigan had hidden the gorier details from her aunt, Tori endeavoured to protect Stevic from some of the uglier parts of her tales. Still, he was as white as a sheet by the end as he rubbed his eyes. Silence had fallen for several minutes before he stood abruptly to stare out the window. Finally he heaved a sigh and sat again by his sister, who had poured them both another cup of tea and by the taste, added a little something to soothe the nerves. He spoke quietly. "It is clear that our family is privileged to have such a woman amongst us and we must do everything we can to look out for her. My poor girl." He stared at his hands and Tori squeezed them. Then she sat straighter and sniffed. "Right. That's enough now. We have the day to get on with." He bowed his head and sighed heavily before grabbing his hat and striding outside.

When Karigan awoke, the sun was shining through the edges of her curtains and small rays of sunshine cast patterns around her room. She watched dust motes float through the air, reflecting light like tiny pieces of floating silver glinting in the sun. She laughed at the thought, thinking back to her last experience with floating pieces of silver. Still she felt good, warm and relaxed and was content to lie for a while yet. She drowsed until nature called before she got up and padded to the bathing room. By the faint rumble in her tummy she thought it must be closer to lunch than not and decided to bathe for the banquet now so she had time to wash and dry her hair. The heat felt so good. As she dried her hair and gently removed some of the easier tangles, she thought that for the first time since her mission up north long ago, she felt good. The night with her aunt had been cathartic and had given her a deep, longed for rest. Coupled with the ease that bathing always made her feel, she decided she felt on top of the world.

She trotted downstairs and whistled her favourite song, listening to her aunts and father busying themselves over the lunch table from the hallway. She glanced at the grandfather clock startled; it was well after midday! She pushed the kitchen door open cheerfully calling, "morning everyone!" and made her way to the sideboard to pour herself a cup of tea and help everyone to a refill. Stace took the full cup off her immediately, as if she was afraid that Karigan would drop it. Her father was staring into his and the rest of her aunts were giving each other furtive glances and busying themselves with various dishes. All conversation stopped.

Karigan sighed and turned to face them squarely, her hands on hips. She was determined to stay in a good mood today. "Listen," she commanded. They all looked at her, their sorrow apparent. "Listen closely," she said harshly. "I am in pain. I will be in pain every day for the rest of my life. I have scars on my body and in my heart and if my king asked me, I would do it again _without question_. I was in service to my king and my country and my family, and it is my right to protect those that I love. I expect you to respect my choices in life. Although there are things I wish had never happened, they did and I have made my peace with it. So now, I expect you to do the same. Agreed?" She stood, waiting. Her father stood and embraced her gently but fiercely. "Aye Kari lass, we will make our peace with it. Just know that your family loves you and couldn't be more proud of you." She hugged her father back and her stomach growled. They all laughed and the mood lightened.

Brini grabbed her a plate and Gretta piled it with food. Stevic started to talk schedules but his sisters quickly shut him up, complaining about shop talk at lunch time. So he sat there contentedly watching as the 5 of them gossiped about the upcoming dinner and what the ladies would wear and he smiled at the look of light on Karigan's face, which had become a rare sight. This dinner was the social highlight of the year in Corsa since it was the night that the trade deals with the islands would be signed, and everyone of note was expected to attend. They had been gossiping for weeks at his kitchen table.

Karigan spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing on the beach, enjoying the few rare hours of leisure she had given herself. She sat and watched the children as they squealed in the surf, trying to jump over the waves. After a while she noticed Richard approaching her in the peripheral vision of her good eye and her stomach tightened. They needed to chat.

He called a greeting and folded his long body beside her, their thighs slightly touching. She cleared her throat and used the action to face him and move apart slightly. Before she could begin he looked at her earnestly and caught her hands in his. "Karigan, please. Let me speak. I hope it's been clear that I have very much enjoyed being around you. Given the dinner is tonight….." He took a deep breath. "I thought it best to try and catch you before and, well….. ask you….well, at least see….where you think this might be heading?" His fumbled speech made her smile. She turned his hands over in hers gently. 'Richard, I am honoured by your attentions, I truly am. But I have an interesting past and people have hurt me. I can't bear you heirs, Richard. I think that I could love you but that's not going to be enough. You are the first born in your clan and your wife will be expected to give you children and it's the one thing I can't do." He stared at her in consternation. "What do you mean, you've been hurt?" She shrugged. "I was in service to the king, Richard. I can't tell you. All I can say is that I will never have children and because I respect you and I like you, I think you should know what it would mean to be involved with me." He opened his mouth and she placed a finger over his lips.

"I'm not interested in a speech about love conquers all; you and I are both heirs. We know better than that." He closed his mouth looking deeply upset and instead, stared out to sea for a while before looking back at her. Karigan was watching him with such a vulnerable, uncertain expression on her beautiful face that all he could do was grasp her hands tighter, kissing the back of them. Then he let them go. "Karigan," he said simply, "you are a rare woman and I suspect my greatest regret in life might be watching you say goodbye." She smiled at him warmly. "Friends?" she asked. "Friends," he replied firmly. "Let's walk". He got up and watched her slowly struggle to her feet, knowing better by now than to offer her assistance. Then he gallantly offered his arm and they wandered down the coast, chatting the afternoon away. The sun was slowly reaching the horizon when he deposited her back at her doorstep. Their laughter died and he gave her one final, penetrating glance, before swopping down to press a gentle kiss on her lips. With a sad smile, he left.


	10. Chapter 10

Karigan entered the house feeling good. Everything about today had been good. Even saying goodbye to Richard; she knew their relationship could have ended very badly but their talk had been….good. As she climbed the steps she met Tori at the top. "Do you want some help getting ready?" Karigan nodded, smiling at her aunt. "Good. I will be in when you are ready to dress."

Karigan climbed into the bath for a quick soak. All this bathing was a bit extravagant but she always washed before big events, using the heat to prepare her mind and back for the additional strain. She got out and towelled herself and just before she reached the painful part of drying her back, a hand gently pulled the towel from her and softly patted the scar tissue. Karigan stiffened but then relaxed, shrugging. Tori knew now; it made no sense not to accept her help when offered. She murmured her thanks and they both entered her bedroom where her evening dress hung near her bureau. Her aunt stood on the small chair near the hearth and lowered the dress over Karigan's head so she barely had to raise her arms. It was the easiest dressing she had undergone in years.

Tori fussed over her hair and applied a small amount of colour to her face before standing Karigan in front of the mirror. "You are glorious," she breathed near Karigan's ear. Karigan was amazed to see her own transformation. Tori had taken advantage of the curls that had formed after her steamy bath, and oiled them so that they cascaded down her back. Karigan had refused to cut her hair in defiance of Nyssa and it had grown back thickly almost to her waist. Her hair was held by a silver pin, cut into the shape of her clan's emblem and adorned with sapphires and amethysts, the clan colours. Her long hair acted as a screen for her scarred neck and allowed Karigan to wear a dress that was inspired by her Eletian friends. They had presented her with gifts of formal Eletian clothing, amongst other things, as a thank you gift when she destroyed Mornhaven.

The silver silk caressed her neck like a second skin and draped in one seamless piece all the way down to her wrists and feet. The silk cocooned her figure, narrowing at her waist before lush, pleated swathes of silk gathered to fall lightly at her feet. Her bodice was stiff to provide structure for her torso, which allowed her back to lay bare to the waist. This is where the magic happened. A different bolt of navy silk curved like a leaf was pinned from one shoulder to the other and held into place with hidden buttons near her ribs, falling down her back until it tapered to a point near her knees. This striking design cleverly ensured her skin was completely covered but no fabric or corset touched her back. The silk had been embroidered with blue and purple thread in flowing designs at the hems and woven through with silver in a constantly shifting pattern, which lent a beautiful sheen to the dress each time she moved.

Karigan's eyes filled with tears to know that her seamstress friends had so thoughtfully woven symbols of her past into their work. She saw flowing leaves to represent her Elt friends, and flying horses, their wings shining in the light. She blinked a few times and cleared her throat. "Thank you, aunt Tori," she replied, turning to hug her aunt soundly. Her aunt cradled her gently before letting go and turning to pick up Karigan's purse. "I hear your father pacing below. Better hop to it!" They chuckled and descended the stairs where her family awaited. After the general fussing had died down, Stevic took his daughters arm. She smiled back at him happily and they made their way to the carriage. They chatted and gossiped on the warm summer evening and Karigan could not remember a more pleasant day.

The air was heavy with the perfume of early summer roses and the heat of the pavement. Karigan stepped down from the carriage and drew in deep breaths of the delicious scent before Stevic escorted her inside to the hall where the guests milled. The hall was crowded and lively given most people were from the local area and were excited to greet old friends and acquaintances. The trade terms had been well and truly hammered out and this signing was ritualistic more than anything else but still there was a slight tension in the air. The female contingent in the hall was noticeably smaller than their male counterparts. Corsa women tended to be more involved in their clans' business than other regions, so the party was larger than perhaps elsewhere would have seen.

The women formed small groups around the hall and Karigan was much admired by them. It was nice; she had known these ladies her whole life and all of them were engaged in good natured conversation. Laughing at the jokes of one of her older neighbours, Karigan was startled to realise how good a time she was having. She reflected for a moment on balls in her past and the unease she had always felt. She had not yet seen Richard, which she was relieved about, although she took a few seconds to gaze around the hall and look for him. She wasn't quite ready to see him yet. Perhaps he was completing preparations for the signing. Hopefully it would start soon; she was getting hungry.

A moment after her musing a gong sounded and the clan chiefs and sub-chiefs were called forward. Karigan joined her father and waited for their name to be called. They did not wait long, given how important the G'ladheon clan was in Corsa. As Karigan entered the signing chamber, her gaze moved to the group that had formed near the table containing the treaty. She saw Richard turn towards her and when she was in full view, his eyes widened in admiration. She smiled and winked at him before following Stevic to the other side of the table to watch the formal proceedings. The last clan entered and silence quickly fell. Richards' father cleared his throat.

"Ladies and gentleman, it is with honour that we welcome our brethren from the Islands to mark this historic occasion for trade amongst our peoples. We deeply respect the relationship that has, and will be forever more, forged between our people. It is thus my pleasure and privilege," he continued with a huge smile, sweeping his hands towards the side entrance, 'to herald the presence of our sovereign, who has joined us for this momentous occasion to honour the Island delegation."

A murmur swept through the crowd just as Karigan's heart stopped beating.

She had half a second to compose herself before King Zachary strode into the room. Unfortunately for her, her mind was in too much shock for it to be of any use. As one the crowd bowed before their King and Karigan found her chest heaving as she fought to gain control over her emotions. She was one of the last to rise and discreetly moved herself behind her father's large bulk, where she could watch the king and calm her breathing. She was sure her chest would be blotchy. Breathing slowly, she stared as the king confidently and calmly greeted the island delegation. He hadn't seen her yet. She couldn't believe it. Groaning inwardly, she cursed Richard for not telling her who the mystery guest was, and herself for failing to ask more questions! What had she been thinking?! The king, _her_ king, the man she had spent so long trying to forget, was standing only a few feet from her.

All of the feelings he had once excited in her, attraction, confusion, awkwardness, admiration and yes, love, flooded through her body as if she had seen him just yesterday. The power of her desire to be near him almost overwhelmed her. She breathed deeply and slowly to calm her mind as her eyes roved over his familiar figure. He was striking in jet black and midnight blue, his presence commanding. He wore a simple fillet of silver atop his amber hair. Even without it the sheer charisma he exuded would have seen every man in that room gravitating towards his leadership. He had no idea how beautiful he was.

Finally Zachary spoke a last few words to the islanders and chiefs before turning towards the table. He watched on as several more speeches were made and then the parties signed the treaty. General applause broke out, another speech, and the party began moving towards the banquet. It became quite clear to Karigan that her grand plan of hiding behind her father had backfired, since she was now closest to the exit. Zachary moved to the door and turned towards her, smiling. His shocked eyes flew into his eyebrows when he realized who it was and she suspected it was only the training of a lifetime of court etiquette that kept his mouth from dropping open. She curtseyed deeply.

"Your majesty," she murmured quietly. King Zachary nodded his head in her direction before turning to Stevic. "Chief G'ladheon, I am very pleased to see you and your daughter. I trust you are well?" Stevic replied but Karigan could tell that her unfazeable king was looking a little…well, fazed. He recovered quickly however. "May I escort your daughter to the banquet, since we are both blocking the way to everyone's well-deserved refreshments?" Stevic chuckled. "Be my guest, sire", he replied with a smile.

Zachary turned and gazed at Karigan with burning eyes, before offering his arm to her. Her gentle touch sent a thrill to his core and he felt the fire spread through his body, as it always did when she was close. Gods, he had missed her. Her beauty always took his breath away but it was her other qualities, her generosity, her intelligence, her passion that made him hers. They were at a loss for a few moments before she asked an inane question about his trip, which he managed to answer with more grace that his first appearance had given rise to. A couple of questions later and all of a sudden, he was being announced and directed into the banquet hall. He could have killed someone for interrupting them. He walked Karigan to her place, which was further away from him than he would have liked.

He went through the mechanics of conversation, still reeling from the encounter. He had known she would be there of course; had expected it. Had prepared for it. What he hadn't prepared for was the intensity of his feelings upon seeing her again. The old familiar ache lodged itself once more in his chest, or perhaps just reawakened from dormancy. He had been devastated when she had left him so unexpectedly the night after ridding them of Mornhaven and had hidden it poorly, even though he had other commitments.

He had felt sorry for Estora throughout their marriage; Karigan's ghost always lay between them like an ethereal wall, neither able to push through. His heart had never been hers, and the sad thing of the matter was she never punished him for it. Until the day she had died, she had been a good woman and wife and his guilt had hung over him for many months. Eventually he had come to reconcile with himself that he was a one woman man and had resigned himself to bachelor life, looking after his kingdom and precious children. But then the trade agreements had crossed his desk and in an instant, he was whisked back to that time when thoughts of Karigan all but consumed him. Taking the natural break in conversation as an opportunity to glance down the table, he found attraction warring with jealousy in his breast as she talked animatedly to the young clan heir seated next to her.


	11. Chapter 11

Karigan was handling dinner better than she had thought possible. Her breathing had slowed and she was even calm enough to steal glances at the king from time to time. It helped that Richard, bereft as he was after their earlier conversation, seemed to have doubled his efforts when talking to her. She caught his open stare at her every so often, which would cause him to blush and busy himself with his food. Must remember not to wear silver again, she thought wryly. After the first few courses were complete, she was back to her normal self, engrossed in his lively conversation and animatedly chatting away. He was such a good friend to her and she was determined to continue their friendship. She had not enjoyed herself in such a long time and the feeling was almost infectious.

The night progressed and everyone was clearly enjoying the lively banquet. Karigan was coming to the part of the evening that always filled her with unease as there was at least one turn of the glass remaining before the formal service ended and she could escape her seat. It was the main reason she excused herself from many of the dinners her father attended; she just could not sit for this long.

Shifting in her chair, Karigan glanced at the clock again calculating how long she should wait until another well-timed absence to the ladies room could be orchestrated. Richard caught her attention and they re-entered a discussion with their partners opposite on the summer trading season. Karigan arched her back softly. The servants cleared the last of the dishes and began serving a small palate cleansing ice before the final meat dish was served.

Karigan took the opportunity to excuse herself and made her way to the side entrance. Luckily, the servants were hurriedly moving between the hall and the kitchen and there was no one watching when she slipped out a side door and wandered down into the gardens. She paused at the edge of a small pond, groaning in an un-ladylike fashion and stretching. Still, she thought, those Eletians really do know how to dress a lady properly. She chuckled, wondering what Enver might have to say about that. She then quieted, staring at the moon and thinking of her Eletian friends, wondering if they might be dancing under the same bright light in their homeland. She snorted. They were Elt; what else would they be doing under a moonlit night? The traitorous part of her mind replied, apart from making plans on how to ruin your life? Karigan rolled her eyes. She really needed to stop talking to herself.

Karigan heard many chairs move and frowned. It was too early for the dinner to have ended yet. Which could only mean….The king must have stood to leave. Karigan hurriedly walked to a nearby oak and stood behind it. She had been to too many receptions at the castle to know what happened next. Somehow, they always met in the gardens. She watched cautiously and within minutes, spotted his familiar black shields taking their stations on the balcony. Karigan knew he had been watching her, knew that he must have noticed how she contrived to escape the confines of her chair. Had been waiting to speak to her. But she wasn't ready. Not now, not in this dress. She needed space to breathe and to think.

She stayed stock still as he ambled out onto the terrace, relaxed to the casual observer but to her, taut as he cast his eyes around eagerly. She was filled with indecision. Did she move or did she stay? Just as she had made up her mind to walk over, he bowed his head and turned around to return to the banquet. Well, it looks like fate made up my mind for me, she thought sadly.

Karigan waited a moment before slowly making her way across the grass. Her breath caught as the moonlight touched the bottom of her dress and the beautiful, glossy patterns shined. Once again, she was overcome at the people in her life that had gone to such effort to make her feel good about herself. It dawned on her that perhaps people had noticed her struggle and without knowing her story, had tried to make her feel better anyway. With a heart full of gladness she re-entered the hall to seat herself for the end to the meal, not noticing the admiring looks cast her way, nor the one who did not look at all.

Once the last spoon had dropped onto the last plate, there was a clatter of chairs and the group moved towards the large ball room. The air was filled with laughter and chatter as the musicians picked up the pace of their music. Partners were quickly formed, young and old; they were old acquaintances here, even if not all the clans were on the best of terms. Richard bowed elaborately to Karigan, who rolled her eyes and laughed before accepting his hand. They moved through a couple of songs together, easy and practiced in each other's company. Her eyes darted around frequently, but she was towards the middle of the circle and couldn't concentrate on dancing and searching for the king so gave up before she made a fool of herself. The dancing was good for Karigan after the prolonged seating but after their third dance together the tempo really picked up and she was ready to bow out.

She saw some of her neighbours near an empty fireplace and began making her way over. As she approached the ladies drew her in to their conversation, eager to tell her how much they admired the dancers, and the music, and the men…..Karigan chuckled. The women in Corsa were strong after generations of weathering tempests and goodbyes to lovers who often never returned from the sea. They were not afraid to tell a man how much they appreciated his strong muscles and fine features, visible to the naked eye or not. Karigan accepted a glass of wine from a passing server and her eyes drifted towards the dance. She immediately sucked in her breath and self-consciously stepped several paces away from the ladies as her next visitor arrived at her side. She curtseyed again.

"Hello, Karigan," said Zachary, smiling into her eyes. She smiled back.

"Good evening, your majesty".

"I thought I might see you tonight. You look lovely."

She blushed and ducked her head, then grew serious. "Sire, I am so sorry for your loss of the Queen. It must has been hard on you. Queen Estora was a wonderful woman and I miss her."

He sighed. "Yes, it has been difficult. Although I feel more sorry for the children than myself. It will be hard for them not to know their mother but at least she did not suffer long after the riding accident. It was quick." He stared into the distance.

"How are the twins?" she asked.

He turned back to her and gave her a wide smile. "They are very well, thank you. I think I will be lucky. I may have a couple of big personalities on my hands as they grow up."

Karigan smiled. "I am sure you will, sire; I wouldn't expect anything less."

His smile softened. "And….how have you been? How is your back?"

She sighed and her expression saddened slightly. He imagined caressing that cheek, imagined the two of them alone in his suites, sharing what lay underneath their masks. Then the magic broke as she shrugged her shoulders. "As good as it will ever be, sire."

Zachary waited a moment but Karigan appeared at a loss for words and no further conversation was forthcoming. He also felt at a loss; for so many months he had dreamt of seeing her and here she was in front of him and he felt like a tongue tied 15 year old. He became aware of the music again, smiling at the memories of times they had danced together in other ballrooms. Hmmmm, this song was slow, he mused. It might work. He bowed to her before offering his hand, his heart glowing to see her smile back as she placed her warm fingers in his. He led her onto the floor and they made their way around the room.

He spun her gently, taking care not to touch her back as she dipped into a pose. He admired the way she had managed to overcome such an injury. All around her other women were bent deeply, their arms outstretched. Karigan limited all her movements to the extent she could move her damaged muscles and yet still danced with more poise than all the others put together. Weapons training and the endurance of the last two years had strengthened the grace in her features and form. Zachary was suddenly overcome by such a strong sense of longing and desperation for her that his hands gripped hers unconsciously and tears formed at the corner of his eyes. He had missed her so much, and loved her with such passion and steadiness. Karigan widened her gaze and he held his breath. After a moment she steadied herself in his arms and drew closer, just so. His eyes closed briefly and he swallowed hard.

Karigan could not believe she was in his arms and yet, here she was. She could tell that Zachary was struggling to be so near to her and she felt the intensity of her longing crash over her, warming her deep in her feminine core. To have the heat of his hands touch hers was almost too much. And she felt when the moment changed, when it became too much for them to bear. She saw the intensity in his gaze and thought for one moment about her decision. But in a way, not; really, she had been thinking for years. She had always felt, the knowledge had always remained at her core, that she loved him wholly without falter. She was forever in service to him and found freedom in the love that cradled her. An instant was all it took for her to make her decision. She looked him in the eye, smiling, and said yes with the slightest touch.

The song came to an end and the revellers dispersed to enjoy drinks and sweet treats. The king was immediately accosted by several of the senior traders. She headed to the balcony. He would know where to find her.

Karigan leaned on the balustrade, enjoying the cool air on her hot limbs. She felt a pair of arms rest next to hers and smiled up into her father's eyes. "Well, Kari girl", he said softly, then stopped at a loss for words. Karigan waited. She had always thought this moment would fill her with trepidation but strangely, she felt none. Karigan snorted at her father's bewildered face and decided to save him, turning to face him directly. "I'm sorry for not telling you father. It was never going to go anywhere before and I just couldn't talk about it. There was no point." He continued staring at her thoughtfully. "I just...will this make you happy?" She nodded and moved her hand to clasp his arm earnestly. "Truly. I never thought I would be lucky enough to find someone who could love me as you did mother". Stevic's eyes teared and he grasped his daughter tightly. She gritted her teeth at the pain and then playfully told him off for ruining her fine dress. "You are going to find yourself in the middle of a storm, lass' he said seriously as he let her go. "This sort of thing has never had happened before. At least there are royal heirs, which should settle everyone. But are you ready for what's about to happen?" She nodded. "You clearly love him. But you won't just become his wife. You would be his queen. Do you fully understand what this might mean for you?" They were interrupted by a cough and turned to find Zachary standing at the door. They both bowed to their king as he walked over to join them.

Zachary was the first to speak. "Chief G'ladheon, it is good to see you, sir." Karigan let go of her father's arm and the men shook hands.

"Sir, with the greatest respect for you and your daughter, I would like to ask for your blessing for Karigan's hand in marriage, if she is willing to give it."

Karigan took Zachary's hand with a smile and Stevic sighed.

"I only ask that you treat her as your equal and protect her as you navigate this period together."

Zachary bowed his head to Stevic with promise. Stevic withdrew and closed the door. He walked back into the ballroom to join his friends, his face melting into a giant grin.

And all of a sudden they were alone. Zachary looked uncertain and Karigan could bear it no longer and she leaned in to kiss him. She later looked back on that moment, chuckling at their first clumsy embrace. But all too soon their earnest need settled into a loving embrace, full of wonder and happiness. They pulled apart and laughed breathlessly. Then she grew serious. "I want to make sure this is what you want. Sire, I," he interrupted her. "Call me by my name." She smiled softly then swallowed, suddenly nervous. "Zachary, I need you to know. I don't think I will be able to bear you children. Not with my back. I don't know what that would do to you, so I need you to be honest with me. If this can't work, that's ok." Zachary stared at her for a long moment, his gaze tender and thoughtful. Then he gently clasped her face between his hands. "I have thought about this often, especially of late. I did not expect….that is, I had suspected as much. I have the twins and they need a mother. And I need a wife. But more than that, I need you. I choose you because I love you, more than you can ever know. Even if we cannot have our own child, we can still be a family, if you wish it."

Karigan's eyes filled with tears and her mind whirled not able to rest on a single thought. To think that this moment had actually come, after all they had been through. It was unfathomable. She felt arms encircle her and sighed with happiness. Minutes later, Karigan glanced at the doors. They had been a while. Zachary saw her glance and let go, offering her his arm. "Shall we, my darling?" he asked with a wide grin. She grinned back and took his arm and they walked into the ballroom together before parting ways. That had been statement enough however and Karigan took a deep breath before encountering her first group of stunned neighbours.


	12. Chapter 12

The noise was horrendous. Every single, damn bell clashed and clanged incessantly and Karigan gritted her teeth slightly at the ringing in her ears. She had always been tone deaf and could never fathom how people sat through the damn noise of a cathedral service. Then she giggled nervously. I guess most people don't normally hear this at their wedding service, she thought. She clasped her flowers more tightly and her father patted the strained arm on his. "It's ok," he whispered. "Now or never," she whispered back. He chuckled lowly and then music– so Karigan assumed – lilted towards them and the vestibule doors opened to reveal the cathedral in all its' glory.

They moved forward slowly, Karigan's heart beating so fast she thought it might explode. Her vision swam with the thousands of people crowded around to peer at her. And then all of a sudden it was ok. She had reached the third entrance and there Zachary stood, his face beaming at the sight of her. Stevic delivered Karigan to his side and at the priest's direction, placed his daughters hand on her suitors'. Karigan stared at Zachary and he at her, neither of them believing that this moment had finally arrived, this wished for and cherished moment. They stood hand in hand as the priest moved through the ceremony, unable to do anything but feel and smile.

Karigan heard the words and at the same time didn't, her mind overwhelmed by the pageantry and the enormity of what was happening. But she clearly heard the moment the priest declared that Zachary could kiss his wife and he leaned forward chastely, his tears mingling with hers. The cathedral and surrounds exploded with cheers as the service concluded and Zachary presented his queen to the well-wishers for the first time.

They paraded slowly through the city and waved at all the revellers. Once they arrived at the castle they were barely able to do more than share a quick kiss before they were whisked to their separate apartments. Fastion and her aunts escorted her to the queen's suite and he bowed to her at the door with a murmured, "Your majesty." She froze and stared at him. He winked back. Right, she thought weakly. This was going to take a while to get used to.

The apartments were beautifully arranged; she has spent a little time that morning admiring her new surroundings when she could spare a glance amongst the ceremony preparations. She had spent the few days before the wedding with her father in town before moving her belongings into the castle the day prior. She had slept in her new bed and felt a sense of unease, despite the opulence of the furnishings. It dawned on her after several hours of restless sleep how strange it was to have a separate living space from Zachary. She knew it was normal but her parents had shared the same quarters and it had never occurred to Karigan to expect anything different with her husband. She wondered what other parts of her new life would take some getting used to. All of it, chimed in the little voice at the back of her head.

The hardest part so far had been rising early on her wedding day and moving toward the sitting room to await her aunts. She had been mid step when all of a sudden her mind was blinded by the memory of a cottage room, a white nightgown and a man with his arms around her, eyes intent on hers. Cade, she thought instantly, as a sob sought to escape her lips. She held onto the back of a chair as the strength of the feelings washed over her and the memory faded. Strange, she thought as she sunk into the chair, I have not thought of him in so long. I guess it's not a surprise on a day like today. It had taken her some time to regain her composure and not a moment too soon, for as she had started to feel like herself again her aunts burst in and the day officially began.

Karigan had insisted on wearing her wedding gown to the ceremony and then to the reception, as she did not want to waste such an expensive, fine gown by wearing it to only one event. After all, the treasury was still recovering from the war with Second Empire. However, her aunts had argued that this was against tradition and she needed to wear something simpler afterwards. In the end she gave in; her other reason of course, was that she and Tori had gone to considerable lengths to make her wedding dress comfortable for her back and she didn't want to wear anything else. Tori was shrewd however and engineered a modification so that the base of the wedding dress could be reclothed in different, lighter silks to become the evening dress. In the end Karigan was relieved to change outfits as she had not realised how heavy the ceremonial dress was going to be and was glad to shed some layers.

She stood in the centre of her sitting room whilst her aunts chatted happily around her and removed the heavy outer layers, ready to clothe her in the silks that would form the new part of her dress. Suddenly Karigan realised what they were doing and quickly manoeuvred Tori into taking off the back layer of white silk. "Smooth," Tori drawled in her ear, which made Karigan laugh. Tori attached the new silks and Karigan looked quickly in the mirror, satisfied but nervous. She had chosen the colours of the Hillander clan to clad herself in and hoped that the king would approve. There was a knock at the door that connected her rooms to Zachary's and she paled. Stop it, she told herself firmly, as her aunts quickly found reasons to exit the room. You can't be scared every time someone knocks on a damn door. What kind of queen will you be? She heard the knock again. "Karigan, may I enter?" Zachary called to her. She took a deep breath. "Of course, your…Zachary."

The door opened and he strode through and stopped dead, staring at her. "You look beautiful," he breathed. She blushed, "I hope you like my colour choice!" He grinned at her. "I certainly do…but I'm looking forward to taking it off you." Oh my, thought Karigan as she felt herself turn scarlet, not knowing where to look. Zachary laughed and strode over to her. She could forgive him for that comment as she stared into his face; an ease and warmth had replaced the perpetual look of strain and sadness he had worn over the years. He looked young and vibrant and all of a sudden, she was looking forward to taking off his clothes as well. He could tell. "You look very handsome," she replied and he swooped in for a kiss that would, she decided, have shocked the priest if Zachary had used his tongue like that at the altar.

She felt herself grow warm and broke apart, pouring them both a glass of wine to give him a moment to rearrange himself. He smiled at her ruefully and she laughed, dispelling some of the sexual tension in the air. After a few sips he offered her his arm and they walked towards the throne room. He chatted with ease but Karigan had trouble replying as she grew more nervous with each step towards their presentation as the royal couple. He squeezed her hand encouragingly and all of a sudden the doors were open and it was over.

The feast was a spectacular success. Speeches were made, the bride was lovely, the king was happy, and the lord governors did not have to worry about commoner born royal heirs on the throne. Karigan was a touch hurt but mostly incredibly relieved that no Eletians arrived to mark the occasion. She mostly felt that Eletians were part of her past but still, one never knew with the Elt folk. She was sure they still watched her. She danced several times with the king as well as with her father and Alton, interspersed amongst the vast number of people she now had to divide her time between. She barely knew any of the riders at the castle now and most of her old friends were spread around the country but a couple had managed to attend the reception and she spoke to them as often as she could. Mara had been unable to attend due to her confinement, which Karigan was delighted about for her friends' sake. And of course, there were endless discussions with people she did not know but were important enough to speak to. She lived for the few moments where she was able to speak to those she knew; she managed a few minutes with Laren and her aunts, who were behaving surprisingly well. Karigan did notice that her father was spending quite a bit of time next to the arch that housed both the Rhovan red and Laren.

Karigan escaped only once to the balcony to ease her back in private. She arched to the side, massaging her hips when her eyes suddenly caught movement in the garden. Alert, she strained her sight before relaxing slightly as a tiendan melted away from the trees seconds later. Karigan was surprised and signalled Fastion to fetch her husband. Zachary was with her seconds later and soon the elegant folk were in front of them, bowing as one. "Well met, Firebrand and Galadheon," said Somial, his eyes warm and smiling.

"It is wonderful to see you," replied Karigan with delight. She was relieved to see that Enver was not one of the party and happy as ever to meet her favourite Eletian.

"Our prince has seen us journey to this blessed occasion to bestow gifts upon your union. Although your people value pageantry it is well that we have the opportunity to see you without curious eyes."

Karigan and Zachary raised their eyebrows at each other before Zachary spoke. "The Eletian people are always welcome in my kingdom. It is kind indeed and an honour for Prince Jametari to bless our marriage."

Somial dipped his head in acknowledgement before his first companion brought forward a small package and presented it to Zachary. He opened it to reveal a brilliant dagger, plain in embellishment except for twining leaves encircling a firebrand at the hilt. It gleamed in the moonlight. "This dagger once belonged to your ancestor, the king that brought peace to your people. It has been cared for by our blacksmiths for many years and your own brand has been etched upon the hilt so that you may lay claim to it. May this remind you of those who will always aid you in your hour of need."

Zachary bowed very deeply to Somial before replying, "I cannot begin to express what this means to me. My deepest thanks for such a treasure."

Somial turned to Karigan as his other companion brought forward a round cloth. Karigan pushed aside the cover to see a small munariel. She cast her fingers over it lightly and the balcony gleamed with light. But unlike all the other munariels she had touched in the past, this glow filled her with a deep peace and happiness and cast a warmer light. Somial smiled. "This munariel has also been cared for by many of my kind. This was left to the guardianship of the Prince by our queen Laurelyn, who instructed that it be presented to you on this auspicious night. She captured a moment when the sun and the moon sung as one, and wove them together to provide you with a reminder of the beauty and softness that can be sought in life. This was her gift to say thank you for all you have done for our people, a sentiment that is shared by many."

Karigan could not speak. Her cheeks were covered in tears and she gripped Somial's hand tightly, overwhelmed at the enormity of this gesture. She had always felt frustrated at the Princes games, yet still felt a strong connection to the Eletians especially as she came to know them. Clearly that feeling was somewhat reciprocated; to have been given such a gift was a tremendous honour.

Zachary was in the middle of professing his gratitude when Somial interrupted him. "One moment Firebrand; the gift giving is not finished as yet. However, this time I am the benefactor." He smiled and stepped towards Karigan before opening her hand with her palm facing up. "I am well aware of the many injuries you have suffered and it fills me with sorrow that you carry such pain in your bearing." His eyes searched hers solemnly. "My gift to you is, I hope, of some use. I have devised a liniment that contains, among other things, precious drops from _Indura Luin_. I am hopeful that it should ease the scars you carry and perhaps even in time, they might be no more than a memory. I can make no promises but what I have I freely give to you, as thanks for saving those of my kind in the Argenthyne grove." He placed a large jar in her hand as he spoke and Karigan stared at it for several seconds.

"I cannot even begin to think of what to say to you Somial. Your generosity….I can't… thank you," she said emphatically.

She walked forwards to embrace him and he gently placed a kiss on each of her cheeks and placed a thumb near her eye patch before pulling away. "You are most welcome," he replied with a smile. Somial turned his face to the moon and closed his eyes, his hands gently lifting to the light. Karigan clasped her munariel tighter and more warmth diffused through her hands and up her arms. She shut her eyes briefly as well. When she opened them, Somial was staring at her. "You have been a greater champion for the people of these lands than you realise. I hope that this claim on you has come to an end and rest may be bestowed upon you instead. It seems strange that a human was to be so instrumental in the saving of our kind, but I am glad it was you. I hope to see you again someday youngling."

Karigan and Zachary returned the Eletians' bows deeply. "It has been my honour to meet with you," Karigan replied. The Eletians took their leave and drifted into the gardens, leaving Zachary and Karigan to stare at each other as well as their gifts.

Zachary loosed a breath. "Well, that was unexpected," he remarked dryly. Karigan snorted. "Eletians. They never change. At least they are dependable in that aspect." Zachary laughed and kissed her on the nose. "Shall we continue facing the hordes?" Karigan chuckled and they passed their gifts to the Weapons. Karigan was glad they moved straight back into the ballroom without further discussion as her mind just couldn't face dissecting another element of their strange life just now. The night continued and despite herself, Karigan wished it would never end. But as the clock stuck each hour of the early morning her back protested more and more loudly and the strain of the long day began to take its toll.

Finally the third bell sounded and the king glanced at the herald to bring the crowd to attention. "My friends, I am ever thankful for your presence here today to celebrate the union between myself and my Queen. Your kindness and generosity will not be forgotten. Alas the kingdom does not rest, so we will retire now in order than we can continue to serve when the sun rises. I beg of you to keep celebrating this momentous day and I hope your heads are not too heavy on the morrow!" The crowd laughed and bowed as the royal couple nodded in return. The room broke out into applause as the doors were opened to allow them to exit.


	13. Chapter 13

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! I hope you have enjoyed my little take on our favourite two heroes. Here's hoping we get a book next year!!

Karigan was feeling elated and lent into Zachary as he wrapped his arm around her. They chatted companionably as they slowly made their way through the corridors when all of a sudden the royal suites were before them. Karigan blushed as Zachary turned to face her. He smiled softly. "Would you like any help with your dress or are you ok?" Karigan could have cried at his kindness for giving her some space. "I'm ok, thanks, " she replied. He nodded. "I'll see you soon." With that he kissed her, his eyes no longer smiling. His hands brushed her arms ever so lightly, sending shoots of electricity coursing through her skin. She shivered and entered her apartments, her eyes never leaving his as she closed the door softly.

Karigan found her new maid sitting in the corner, waiting for her. "Hi Jade," she said, somewhat wearily as Jade bowed. "Good evening, your majesty." Karigan blinked slowly. I've really got to get used to that, she thought. Karigan could hear water piping in her bathroom and could have kissed the girl with joy. She also had to stop kissing everyone she met. Well, everyone except… Smiling and shaking her head at the direction of her thoughts, she walked into the bathroom and started removing pins from her hair, feeling the relief as the strain left her head. She felt hands join hers as Jade assisted with her disrobing.

Jade went to reach for Karigan's dress pins when she was stopped mid-air by a hand gripping hers. She stood, head bowed and apprehensive of her new mistress. "Jade," Karigan said, "I think we need to talk quickly before you help me with my dress." Jade stood demurely. "I am sorry if I have offended you at all, your majesty." Karigan's eyebrows drew in puzzlement, too tired to figure out what the girl meant. "I don't….Jade I need to tell you something. You may have heard that I was a green rider once upon a time." Jade's lips dipped slightly in amusement before replying "Yes, your majesty." Karigan groaned inwardly. Of course she had. It was just so damn hard to tell a stranger. "Well, anyway. I performed many services for the king and I… sustained some injuries in doing so. There are wounds on my body. Especially my back. Just to let you know so you're not surprised." Jade bowed, "of course, your majesty. Please let me know if I can assist you in any way." Karigan sighed. "I can't move my arms too high so you are going to have to help me with my dress."

Karigan turned as Jade gently undid the pins and removed the back pieces of fabric. She watched Jade's reflection in the mirror opposite, watched as Jade's eyebrows flew up in horror as the dress slipped off Karigan and fell to the floor, revealing her scars in all their glory.

All of a sudden, the night caught up with Karigan. "Thank you, that will be all. I shall see you in the morning," she said brusquely. Jade bowed and murmured, "Good night, your majesty," before collecting the fallen garments and bowing out of the bathroom. Karigan stood naked in front of the mirrors staring at the scars shining back to her in all their ravaged glory and loathed herself all of a sudden. The day had been so long, her back was so sore, she felt overwhelmed with emotion, and at the end of it all, a king expected to lie with a beautiful wife who in truth looked more like a leftover battle axe. Karigan could barely look at herself and felt hot tears dripping down her face. Part of her knew that it was the exhaustion and stress talking but it was a part growing smaller by the second as her tears became an uncontrolled torrent.

She hurried out to the sitting room and reached the door connecting her room to Zachary's just in time to lock it as she felt the doorknob move. "Karigan?" a soft voice called. "I'm sorry," was her garbled reply as she made her way back into the bathroom and sank into the hot water. She sobbed and sobbed, letting waves of emotion crash over her as the heat worked its' magic on her back. Eventually her sobs quietened and she calmed. The pain had eased considerably and the water was lukewarm. With practiced ease she poured oil onto the water and moved her shoulders all around so that it coated her back, which softened the tightness of her skin. She breathed in the familiar scent of lavender and found the routine comforting. She was surprised to hear the fourth bell sound in the distance and got up slowly, feeling much more herself.

She put her nightdress on and brushed her long hair slowly, running her fingers through it's' lengths. She stood again in front of the mirror looking at the beautiful white cotton dangling off her shoulders, following the contours of her breasts and stomach, tapering at her thighs. She stroked the soft fabric in her hands and shivered. Karigan slowly walked out, feeling the heat of the hearth flames matching the heat that had grown in her cheeks. She thought about the man who stood waiting for her, the man she had so desperately wished to be one with for the years they had been forced apart.

Karigan hesitated at the door, reaching for the handle but unable yet to unlock it. What would he say after such a commotion? With a start, she realised that she was his wife. She now had the right to find out. Karigan leant her ear to the door to listen for noises, half thinking he might have fallen asleep and perhaps she should do the same. But no, there was the faint sound of pacing. Karigan sent a final thought of thanks to the gods before unlocking the key and slowly opening the door, unsure whether she should cross the threshold.

The sight that greeted her eyes was not one she would soon forget. Zachary stood framed by the fire, one arm on his waist and the other raking his hair. His shirt was half unbuttoned and Karigan found it difficult not to stare at his well-developed chest. He had stopped mid stride and was looking at her with worry. "Are you ok?" he asked anxiously. Karigan stepped forward into the room. "I'm sorry," she said evenly. "It's been such a long day and I felt, strange," she finished lamely. He smiled at her. Since the day she had sealed the Aeon Ire, they had been connected in a way that seemed immutable. And although she felt a hesitation at breaking this final barrier, she knew it had more to do with worry of her wounds than how she felt about him. Karigan had never felt more certain of her love. Alright, time to 'fess up, she thought. She took a deep breath. "I feel that after all this time, after all this…want between us, I don't want you to be disappointed if I can't…" Gods, I can't stuff this up any more if I tried, she thought with exasperation. She looked at him beseechingly, her eyes asking him to reassure her where her lips had failed.

In three swift movements he was in front of her, his arms grasping hers with trembling intensity. "Karigan, I want you to listen closely. I have loved none other than you. I cannot imagine that I could possibly love you more than I do right this second. I still cannot grasp the fact that we are truly together, after all this time. You could have lost your arms and I still wouldn't care. It is you I love, not your skin, and don't for one second think anything differently." He burnt with passion, but he waited. She thought for a moment, letting his declaration settle and soothe her. Enough, she said to herself.

She could feel the warmth starting to burn through her again as her tension melted and she grew more comfortable. She smiled. "Are you sure you don't love my skin?" she teased. In answer, he growled and kissed her. She met his lips with her own, and her embrace was equally fiery as her urgent need to be with him, filled by him, overtook her senses.

Soon all she knew was heat and warmth as his kisses trailed down her neck. She moaned as he reached her collarbone and then he was struggling with his clothes, kissing her whilst he fumbled with ties, as if he couldn't bear to be without her touch for even a single moment. Whilst he was busy, she undid the bows on her nightgown sleeve and the garment fell to pool at her feet. He stopped and stared at her naked body, his fingers drifting down her neck, her breasts and her navel. She closed her eyes, feeling intense pleasure at his touch. She shivered and he stopped, moving closer. She felt his loins brush against her, hard with desire. "You are so incredibly beautiful. I love you," he murmured into her ear. "I love you too," she whispered back, circling her arms around his waist and placing feather like kisses against his chest.

He groaned and leaned into her and the pressure against her thighs was intoxicating. His lips attacked hers hungrily and he pulled her down onto the rug by the fire, settling her on top of his hips. After a moment of fumbling he was inside her and she gasped at the unexpected feeling. There was a moment of pain and discomfort as he started to move and then she was lost as desire flooded every inch of her before waves of passion crashed over her body. Her climax was spectacular and she gazed down at him, panting and soft.

He had spent those precious moments watching as she had immersed herself in the experience and he was filled with a hunger like he had never known before. He could not bear it a second more when she smiled at him and in an instant he was sitting up, thrusting deeply into her and climaxing himself. She kissed his temples, his cheek, and he could have wept over the depth of love and care that each kiss held. They both sat for some while as their passion faded, clasping each other for dear life. Their union felt as if it has soothed a hundred hurts they never knew existed. Then Karigan yawned and Zachary laughed and kissed her soundly. "Well my love, it seems we are both due for a little rest." Karigan closed her eyes, "I don't even know if I can make it to bed. I might just fall asleep right here." He laughed. "As much as I like the sound of that, I suspect it might look a little strange to the servants in the morning." Karigan agreed and they untangled themselves.

They started forward and awkwardly ran into each other as Karigan turned towards his rooms and he turned towards hers. He hesitated. "Do you want me to walk you to your chambers?" Karigan was confused. "Um, I guess so. I just thought I would be sleeping with you. I hadn't really thought about how this would work." Zachary blinked and grinned. "You know, that never entered my head. But I would be the happiest husband in the world if you would sleep with me tonight." Karigan trailed her fingers down his arm and blushed. "Well, I thought that I might sleep with you every night. If you want." He smiled broadly and held out his hand for hers, then they both walked to his bed and fell asleep in each other's arms.

Karigan opened her eyes to find Zachary tracing the lines of her face with his eyes. She smiled at him and he leaned over to kiss her. "Gods," he said, his voice muffled in her hair, "You won't believe how many times I've dreamed of this moment. It doesn't feel real. I don't understand what I did for the gods to be so gracious." Karigan gazed at him thoughtfully. "We have both been through an awful lot the last few years. Perhaps it is a sign of better things to come." Or, she thought, more likely, the gods felt bad for manipulating her every which way. Not that gods felt bad. But still.

Zachary answered her slight frown with a slow kiss that gradually grew more and more urgent, his hands running over her body before resting on her breasts. She answered his embrace with equal passion and delighted in his gasps as her fingers found their way to his manhood. In a moment of lucidity she found herself surprised at her own boldness and enjoyment of this aspect of their marriage, which was far more than she had expected. But their connection was so strong and had endured so many challenges that she supposed it wasn't that surprising after all.

And then the moment of thought gave way to moans and sighs before finally he was on top of her, thrusting. Her hands ran down his stomach, taunt with muscle as he levered his weight off her. He hissed at her touch and drove harder. Before long they were both crying out with pleasure and release. He collapsed by her side. Karigan scooted into his arms and drew patterns on his chest as they came down to earth and their breath returned to normal.

Eventually the realities of being human got them out of bed and Karigan managed to put her nightclothes on without too much difficulty, before making her way across to her bedroom to bathe and change. She gracefully swallowed down blushes as her maid came in to brush her hair, wayward after a night of lovemaking. Jade then rubbed a small amount of liniment onto Karigan's back. Karigan stood for a few minutes afterwards and considered how she felt. Maybe, a little less tight? A little more ease? She shrugged; only time would tell if this salve would work although knowing who made it gave Karigan more hope than she had ever had in her quest for relief.

Karigan entered her wardrobe and although she would have given anything to wear her comfortable merchants outfit, she instead chose a cotton gown that would keep her cool as she joined the lord governors at the morning brunch.

She left her bedroom, clean and brushed and hungry, to find Zachary standing in front of the window looking handsome and happy. She crossed to him and he encircled her in his arms. "I love you, Zachary," she said, his smile growing wider. "I love you too, Karigan." And all of a sudden, it didn't matter that she couldn't wear her merchant's clothes or that she had royal duties from now until the end. All that mattered was that her heart was cared for by a man who loved her as she was, and whom she loved just as equally. Her peer, her lover, her companion. She smiled. All was well.


End file.
